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Heartbroken over kids
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<blockquote data-quote="Winnielg" data-source="post: 601126" data-attributes="member: 16059"><p>We went thru the same thing... repeatedly. difficult child routinely tells people that we are abusing him - friends, teachers and social workers at school (he just graduated... barely). The teachers and social workers he would tell that we withheld food and would not allow him to leave the house (right... that never happened) and his 'friends' or girls he was trying to make feel sorry for him he would tell that we physically abused him. At one point he logged into Facebook on my phone and forgot to log out. I found one conversation where the people he was telling all these lies to were like "tell an adult, tell a teacher, tell a social worker ... they will help you'. As all lies, of course he could not. I promptly logged out as I did not want to know what he was saying about us.</p><p></p><p>I think peers, eventually, will see thru this as they deal with your difficult child on their own. </p><p> </p><p>I was convinced all the teachers thought we were horrible parents. The Special Education teacher and social worker made sure to tell me that we were the teachers favorite parents mid year during his senior year. I was astounded and asked how that was the case when I knew what he would say about us all the time? They said, unlike many parents, we wanted difficult child to be held accountable for actions, not doing work/projects, having behavior issues at school, etc. This amazed me - I cannot believe parents go in and yell at folks to leave their kid alone. </p><p></p><p>So I guess what I am trying to say is that if you know in your heart of hearts that you are doing everything you can to help your difficult child, no matter how hurtful it is to know what she is saying 'out there', there is really nothing you can do about it. And somehow you have to come to some sort of peace with that. </p><p></p><p>On another note re Facebook - which I really dislike! - my difficult child is too much as he blocks my hubby and I from posts but does not block aunts, uncles MY girlfriends that he has friended over the years. So I constantly get calls asking if I know that difficult child has a girlfriend, lost his bike, is begging people to talk to him, etc. I always respond - nope!</p><p></p><p></p><p>I just saw your grandkids comment - and I am so sorry - that certainly adds a terrible layer of complexity to all of this - hang in there</p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/smile.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":smile:" title="smile :smile:" data-shortname=":smile:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Winnielg, post: 601126, member: 16059"] We went thru the same thing... repeatedly. difficult child routinely tells people that we are abusing him - friends, teachers and social workers at school (he just graduated... barely). The teachers and social workers he would tell that we withheld food and would not allow him to leave the house (right... that never happened) and his 'friends' or girls he was trying to make feel sorry for him he would tell that we physically abused him. At one point he logged into Facebook on my phone and forgot to log out. I found one conversation where the people he was telling all these lies to were like "tell an adult, tell a teacher, tell a social worker ... they will help you'. As all lies, of course he could not. I promptly logged out as I did not want to know what he was saying about us. I think peers, eventually, will see thru this as they deal with your difficult child on their own. I was convinced all the teachers thought we were horrible parents. The Special Education teacher and social worker made sure to tell me that we were the teachers favorite parents mid year during his senior year. I was astounded and asked how that was the case when I knew what he would say about us all the time? They said, unlike many parents, we wanted difficult child to be held accountable for actions, not doing work/projects, having behavior issues at school, etc. This amazed me - I cannot believe parents go in and yell at folks to leave their kid alone. So I guess what I am trying to say is that if you know in your heart of hearts that you are doing everything you can to help your difficult child, no matter how hurtful it is to know what she is saying 'out there', there is really nothing you can do about it. And somehow you have to come to some sort of peace with that. On another note re Facebook - which I really dislike! - my difficult child is too much as he blocks my hubby and I from posts but does not block aunts, uncles MY girlfriends that he has friended over the years. So I constantly get calls asking if I know that difficult child has a girlfriend, lost his bike, is begging people to talk to him, etc. I always respond - nope! I just saw your grandkids comment - and I am so sorry - that certainly adds a terrible layer of complexity to all of this - hang in there :smile: [/QUOTE]
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