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Help her? Let her sink? What's a mom of an 18 yr old to do?
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 211012" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Hi, </p><p> </p><p>You know a book that helped me cope with to do or not to do was Tough Love. Also there are a list of detachment rules here that I myself have been trying to put into part of our lives with our son (also age 18). </p><p> </p><p>Today I had to sit before a panel of people and tell them in FRONT of my son that should he NOT sign a contract to go to a place we ALL feel is not good for him - he can NOT come home and would therefore become homeless. </p><p> </p><p>I had to provide a list of shelters for him in case this becomes a reality - </p><p> </p><p>And I have also spent the better part of the last year - BUTTING out. </p><p> </p><p>It's a mix I think of Do I butt in and help or do I butt in and take over? Finding a balance with myself for my son has been incredibly hard for me because I'm a take charge person - a manager, an organizer, a do-er, a get it done NOW don't wait person. </p><p> </p><p>I hope you find your thin line and learn to like it there until you can move on. Not the greatest place to be I know. </p><p> </p><p>Hugs</p><p>Star</p><p> </p><p>oh and by the way - I think when it comes to medications? I"M BUTTING IN - how can someone who is depressed KNOW things they should know when depression alters your mind and choices? UGH.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 211012, member: 4964"] Hi, You know a book that helped me cope with to do or not to do was Tough Love. Also there are a list of detachment rules here that I myself have been trying to put into part of our lives with our son (also age 18). Today I had to sit before a panel of people and tell them in FRONT of my son that should he NOT sign a contract to go to a place we ALL feel is not good for him - he can NOT come home and would therefore become homeless. I had to provide a list of shelters for him in case this becomes a reality - And I have also spent the better part of the last year - BUTTING out. It's a mix I think of Do I butt in and help or do I butt in and take over? Finding a balance with myself for my son has been incredibly hard for me because I'm a take charge person - a manager, an organizer, a do-er, a get it done NOW don't wait person. I hope you find your thin line and learn to like it there until you can move on. Not the greatest place to be I know. Hugs Star oh and by the way - I think when it comes to medications? I"M BUTTING IN - how can someone who is depressed KNOW things they should know when depression alters your mind and choices? UGH. [/QUOTE]
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Help her? Let her sink? What's a mom of an 18 yr old to do?
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