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HELP!! I have a 10 yr old daughter that will not or maybe can not follow directions!!
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<blockquote data-quote="nic67" data-source="post: 436555" data-attributes="member: 12170"><p>First I will admit that I am new to this forum, so I hope I don't overstep any bounds. I have a 9 year old daughter who cannot follow multistep directions. She isn't dumb or defiant. She really can't. She is left handed but so is my father (a builder who finished many houses) and a brother (a pilot who I hope can follow directions!) In my case my daughter has acute anxioty. It can take on many of the forms like Aspergers (because they have the some of same symptoms.) She may even be considered mild bipolar, but at her age it is difficult to tell. Some of it is just she is still young. With Anxioty, patients often are Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) (obsessive compulsive) in that she is afraid of the task itself (and failing at doing it or some other aspect of it) and becomes obsessed over it so much so that ADD comes into play. Her obsession with doing the task or not being able to do the task causes her to be able to attend to the obsession and not any other aspect of what is happening (leaving steps out, getting beyond a step, leaving dirt behind on dishes.) Ask yourself, does she frustrate easily. Did she have tantrums (still does?) Is she easly overstimulated (ours is with noise because her eyesight isn't perfect.) Did she do puzzles, crafts, coloring books? No not surprising if she didn't. Learning to read was a nightmare.</p><p>No great solutions on our front but to be patient and do the task with her over and over until she finds it routine and she is confident enough to complete the task on her own. As hard as it is, give her a lot of compliments (until you sound like those over bearing scarry nice nice parents.) Don't get mad. It is the hardest thing you will ever have to do. Being sneaky is just part of it. It actually gives a sense of confidence. Consequense should be fair and really spelled out and concrete. Don't question her lack of success (not cleaning the dog food bowl) show her that she missed some spots and have her do it again and again and again. She will get it. Also, talk to your health care professional about the behaviors. I have always found it helpful to have an incident notebook with me so that I can remember what happened and when. It also makes me appear that I pay attention.</p><p>Good luck!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="nic67, post: 436555, member: 12170"] First I will admit that I am new to this forum, so I hope I don't overstep any bounds. I have a 9 year old daughter who cannot follow multistep directions. She isn't dumb or defiant. She really can't. She is left handed but so is my father (a builder who finished many houses) and a brother (a pilot who I hope can follow directions!) In my case my daughter has acute anxioty. It can take on many of the forms like Aspergers (because they have the some of same symptoms.) She may even be considered mild bipolar, but at her age it is difficult to tell. Some of it is just she is still young. With Anxioty, patients often are Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) (obsessive compulsive) in that she is afraid of the task itself (and failing at doing it or some other aspect of it) and becomes obsessed over it so much so that ADD comes into play. Her obsession with doing the task or not being able to do the task causes her to be able to attend to the obsession and not any other aspect of what is happening (leaving steps out, getting beyond a step, leaving dirt behind on dishes.) Ask yourself, does she frustrate easily. Did she have tantrums (still does?) Is she easly overstimulated (ours is with noise because her eyesight isn't perfect.) Did she do puzzles, crafts, coloring books? No not surprising if she didn't. Learning to read was a nightmare. No great solutions on our front but to be patient and do the task with her over and over until she finds it routine and she is confident enough to complete the task on her own. As hard as it is, give her a lot of compliments (until you sound like those over bearing scarry nice nice parents.) Don't get mad. It is the hardest thing you will ever have to do. Being sneaky is just part of it. It actually gives a sense of confidence. Consequense should be fair and really spelled out and concrete. Don't question her lack of success (not cleaning the dog food bowl) show her that she missed some spots and have her do it again and again and again. She will get it. Also, talk to your health care professional about the behaviors. I have always found it helpful to have an incident notebook with me so that I can remember what happened and when. It also makes me appear that I pay attention. Good luck! [/QUOTE]
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HELP!! I have a 10 yr old daughter that will not or maybe can not follow directions!!
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