Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by mog, Aug 23, 2009.

  1. mog

    mog Member

    I never get a break!!! When difficult child decided he would go to a safe house for ALL of us to take a break --my easy child ended up in the emergency room and I stayed up day and night to watch her then finally feel safe enough to sleep and get a call that difficult child ran away from safe house.
    Months later now- I just moved easy child down to the dorm and this is her first weekend down there. Her Boyfriend went up to see her and he car broke down. we asked family to go help them and the boyfriend is rude to them his car is too good for "amateurs" --then husband is calling to see what the problem is and easy child tells husband to leave her boyfriend alone. I trust her -she has good values and I am not worried about them having a physical relationship because she has already told him and everyone else that she plan to stay pure until her wedding night and she is pretty determined to follow Gods law. I am upset that she was rude to husband after the boyfriend was rude to the people trying to help him. So they finally got the car fixed in the morning and went off to meet his grandparents. ---meanwhile husband was a little childish when he was continually call the boyfriend to "help" with the car problem so I kinda understand why easy child was upset --OH I left out that husband had been with friends and had been drinking since 11:30 am and it was about 10:30 pm when easy child called for help.
    So I really haven't seen or talked to husband in the last two days since his friends are in town and I found out about 1 1/2 hours after I left to go to church this afternoon that he left with his friends out of town and might be back tomorrow --he left a message on my voicemail to tell me. He was soo drunk when he was "talking" to easy child's boyfriend - that is why I said that I kinda understand why she was upset with husband but they should not have been rude to other family that went to help.
    Anyway, difficult child did not even know that husband is gone - he left about 1:00 today after sleeping until 12:00 then got mad that I expected him to do his chores and just left. I went to church and came home -when difficult child came home I asked him nicely to take care of his chores because I thought that maybe he and I would go to the movie but he started a fight and I left as to not start a fight. I went to the movies alone to cool off --He text me at 9;54 to tell me he was going to sleep. I text him back to ask if he took his medications and never got an answer. I got home to find out that he was GONE
    So after all I ended up having to call the JPO to let him know that he is gone. I feel horrible--husband is gone--easy child is gone --difficult child is gone and now in trouble because I had to call the JPO on him. He finally text me at 12:55 that he is staying where he is -I ask where are you and he wont answer. I dont even get one day at peace. I am so tired of being alone - mind -health and body. I NEVER GET A BREAK!!! Why? If I have to be alone should I not be alone. Why do all of this when NO one cares. difficult child says he wants to be put with a foster family --should I let him go -- will they do that --he already hates me enough and if he goes doesn't that mean that I did not care and did everything I could. But is it worth it when all he presents is HATE for me. Sorry just don't know anymore
  2. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Mog, I'm sorry you're feeling so alone. I'm glad you come here for support.

    What is being done to stabilize your difficult child's medications and work with him in therapy? Those are the important things in my mind to deal with his mental illness.
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm sorry things are so rough right now. Just sending supportive hugs and good thoughts your way.
  4. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    I am so sorry! I hope you can get some rest today. Find ways to pamper yourself. Do something for yourself that you have not done in a long time.
  5. mog

    mog Member

    He refused to go to the Doctor on first -the one that works on his medications- the therapist has been working with us but since school started he is not really participating. I fear that he might be mixed up with a bad crowd but he wont talk to me he tells me it is none of my business. I spoke with him briefly today and he still says he is not coming home. The JPO that checks in on weekends was just here and I had to report to him tht difficult child is still gone. I am afraid now of what this will bring.
  6. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Is it possible to get him into a treatment facility?
  7. mog

    mog Member

    He has already been in two different facilities and did some time in the detention center. He was gone from Oct 2008 to April 2009. When he first came home things were great -he was willing to work hard and appreciative of everything but now he is out of control. He is back to his old tricks since school started. I ask him about what is going on and he tells me it is none of my business. We had to have a meeting to beg for them to let him come home. They wanted to sent him to juvy for 2 years.