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Family of Origin
Hey, Cedar, or anyone interested in FOO (Family of Origin) issues. Cedar, WHY NOW???
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 660418" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Well, my son was here 6 minutes maximum. He acted sad but nervous. Not about anything to do with me. Like kind of on pins and needles. I tried to get him to eat. "Here's these Molten things. Eat them while they're warm, why don't you. I forgot and put a little salt in the vegetables, but not in the meat."</p><p></p><p>"It's okay," he replied.</p><p></p><p>Within 2 minutes he happened to mention that he was locked out from where he was staying for the night, that he had not remembered that the woman who is letting him stay with her works from Wednesday to Saturday.</p><p></p><p>Then he began to say something like the following: "If I call the City (where he is going) and get a 2 or 3 night placement...."</p><p></p><p>I interrupted him and said: "You cannot stay here for the night."</p><p></p><p>He got up. He went to the bathroom. He came back out. He picked up his pack. And he walked right out the door. "Are you leaving?" He did not answer. He did not look back. I did not go after him.</p><p></p><p>He had not eaten a bite of his food.</p><p></p><p>I ate a molten chocolate thing.</p><p></p><p>So there we are.</p><p></p><p>I am sad. Maybe I will always be. But I think I have some clarity, too. There is no walking back from this. It is what it is and no amount of suffering by me will change it. Not one bit.</p><p></p><p>He is walking his own path, the path he chose. Due to stupidity or because of illness or hubris or immaturity or naivete or by accident. I don't know. Maybe I could have done something different or better. I cannot change the past. Only he can change things now. Maybe he will. Maybe he won't.</p><p></p><p>I was not a bad mother. But there is nothing more that I can do that I can see.</p><p>___</p><p></p><p>I do not know why it is worth everything for him that I consent that he stay here at the house; why he is putting the whole relationship on the table. He has options. He might not like them, but he has them.</p><p></p><p>Is it about power? Or is it about a sense of rejection? Or is it about not wanting to grow up and be responsible for doing so? As Lil might say, color me sad. And confused.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 660418, member: 18958"] Well, my son was here 6 minutes maximum. He acted sad but nervous. Not about anything to do with me. Like kind of on pins and needles. I tried to get him to eat. "Here's these Molten things. Eat them while they're warm, why don't you. I forgot and put a little salt in the vegetables, but not in the meat." "It's okay," he replied. Within 2 minutes he happened to mention that he was locked out from where he was staying for the night, that he had not remembered that the woman who is letting him stay with her works from Wednesday to Saturday. Then he began to say something like the following: "If I call the City (where he is going) and get a 2 or 3 night placement...." I interrupted him and said: "You cannot stay here for the night." He got up. He went to the bathroom. He came back out. He picked up his pack. And he walked right out the door. "Are you leaving?" He did not answer. He did not look back. I did not go after him. He had not eaten a bite of his food. I ate a molten chocolate thing. So there we are. I am sad. Maybe I will always be. But I think I have some clarity, too. There is no walking back from this. It is what it is and no amount of suffering by me will change it. Not one bit. He is walking his own path, the path he chose. Due to stupidity or because of illness or hubris or immaturity or naivete or by accident. I don't know. Maybe I could have done something different or better. I cannot change the past. Only he can change things now. Maybe he will. Maybe he won't. I was not a bad mother. But there is nothing more that I can do that I can see. ___ I do not know why it is worth everything for him that I consent that he stay here at the house; why he is putting the whole relationship on the table. He has options. He might not like them, but he has them. Is it about power? Or is it about a sense of rejection? Or is it about not wanting to grow up and be responsible for doing so? As Lil might say, color me sad. And confused. [/QUOTE]
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Family of Origin
Hey, Cedar, or anyone interested in FOO (Family of Origin) issues. Cedar, WHY NOW???
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