Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
hi everyone, my life in a big nutshell
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Belzog" data-source="post: 173538" data-attributes="member: 5542"><p>Thanks everyone for welcoming me and your input.</p><p></p><p>First an update: We talked to his public defender today. I had to yell at him to get him out of bed. "I am not coming back to the house to get you for your appointment this afternoon. I'm leaving in 20 minutes, be in the car!!!" Sheesh. I had knots in my stomach the whole drive to town.</p><p></p><p>He's not charged with shoplifting but concealing merchandise. This is because the manager stopped him before he got out of the store. Had he actually made it outside, the charge would have been more serious. He's lucky. I have caught him with stuff lots of times that he didn't have money to pay for. Because he has a prior conviction, the seriousness of the charge is elevated though.</p><p></p><p>The other charge we have to go to court for disposition for next week is his simple possession charge (marijuana.) That one is more complicated. My boyfriend and I are testifying against him, because we are the ones who found him with the pot. This being the case, I can't be present when his attorney advises him.</p><p></p><p>When I talked to my mom about it, she asked me who's side I'm on. "His!" I want him to be held accountable for his actions before they escalate to something really heinous. I want him to learn his lesson NOW before something irremediable happens.</p><p></p><p>When I asked the 3rd year law school girl assisting the atty how I go about requesting that his mental health be court-ordered, she told me that they would be representing my son and HIS best interests. "Wait a minute," I objected. "I have his best interests in mind too. I want him to continue to have the opportunity to explore his issues in counseling and if the only way he'll do that is if the court orders it, so be it." I figure about the best I can do is facilitate his having the opportunity to work on his challenges. That's about all I CAN do at this point. </p><p></p><p>So I guess I'll be talking to the DA. </p><p></p><p>Son says he'd rather go to jail than continue mental health treatment. What an idiot.</p><p></p><p>________________________</p><p></p><p>Depressive symptoms: showed up before hospitalization last June. He's been a troubled young man for... a long long time. I had him psychologically evaluated by the school in another state after his bio-father dropped off the earth (ok, Japan) and he started pathologically lying. Actually that was about 2 years after he started having these fits. He would come home from school (2nd grade) and start cussing at me and trying to hurt me. Now, this is a kid who never swore, but he was using the most profane and violent language. And he was trying to bite me and claw me. Anything. He told me once that he was going to get a knife out of the kitchen and stab me and his little brother while we were sleeping. I guess I've been afraid of my son every since he was 7. </p><p></p><p>Anyway, in 4th grade, the nice young girl with the dept of ed. said he was perfectly fine. The lying got worse. And I wanted to take him to counseling, but I was afraid he'd get me arrested. Besides, the nice doctor lady said he was acting appropriate for the life circumstances and everything was fine. I regret not having the guts to put in in therapy for another 5 years.</p><p></p><p>He started skipping class and led some acquaintances to believe he was suicidal and had a knife at school in 9th grade. The school called me solely because they had to search his wheelchair and backpack. Otherwise they wouldn't have? What's up with that?</p><p></p><p>So.... I don't think his mood issues are a function of his antidepressants.</p><p></p><p>___________________</p><p></p><p>The Seroquel still seems to be helping, but not as magically as those first days.</p><p></p><p>_______________</p><p></p><p>I already know about baking soda, soaks, vinegar, essential oils.... for urine smells. It's my experience that I've got a much better chance of having fresh laundry if it's cotton. Once a smell gets in synthetic fibers, forget about it. My boyfriend has gym clothes that he washed with scented fabric softener before we started dating over 1 1/2 years ago, and to me they still reek. Yucky chemical smell. ew.</p><p></p><p>_____________</p><p></p><p>I've started my second summer school class. I'll graduate next spring. Wed. this week was the second day. I started panicking before class and went outside to cry. I called my boyfriend and he said all the right things. He assured me that my son would be ok, eventually and that things would iron out and all that. I don't care if it's plausible, sometimes I just need the hope. </p><p></p><p>If he didn't have challenged kids, Autism and probable bi-polar daughter, I don't think he'd have the stomach for our load of ****.</p><p></p><p>After court today, I felt totally emotionally drained and of course son was pitching a hissy because I won't entertain the notion of his friend sleeping over this weekend. "How about you do chores every day for a week, then ask me," I suggested.</p><p></p><p>Well, he said he was going to try and die as soon as possible, and he was leaving the house without his leg brace or shoe on his right foot (he has an open sore that is not looking too good and is irritated by his appliance) and he didn't want to take the wheelchair, because it is one he's borrowing from a friend and he wasn't planning on coming back home. As you can imagine this all made me feel super.</p><p></p><p>I was able to get him to agree to come home by 7pm and make an effort to be safe.</p><p></p><p>My other son is spending the night at a friends' and by boyfriend and his son are camping tonight. So I went over to my neighbor's house and asked her, "Can I ask you kind of a personal favor?" "Will you give me a hug?" I started crying and she gave me a hug. We talked about how our sucky cable co. hasn't come through with repairing storm damage yet (it had been like 20 hours - come on people, we've got the net to surf and quality cable programs to watch!!!) and I told her about legal stuff.</p><p></p><p>Don't you ever feel like you wish your life bored someone?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Belzog, post: 173538, member: 5542"] Thanks everyone for welcoming me and your input. First an update: We talked to his public defender today. I had to yell at him to get him out of bed. "I am not coming back to the house to get you for your appointment this afternoon. I'm leaving in 20 minutes, be in the car!!!" Sheesh. I had knots in my stomach the whole drive to town. He's not charged with shoplifting but concealing merchandise. This is because the manager stopped him before he got out of the store. Had he actually made it outside, the charge would have been more serious. He's lucky. I have caught him with stuff lots of times that he didn't have money to pay for. Because he has a prior conviction, the seriousness of the charge is elevated though. The other charge we have to go to court for disposition for next week is his simple possession charge (marijuana.) That one is more complicated. My boyfriend and I are testifying against him, because we are the ones who found him with the pot. This being the case, I can't be present when his attorney advises him. When I talked to my mom about it, she asked me who's side I'm on. "His!" I want him to be held accountable for his actions before they escalate to something really heinous. I want him to learn his lesson NOW before something irremediable happens. When I asked the 3rd year law school girl assisting the atty how I go about requesting that his mental health be court-ordered, she told me that they would be representing my son and HIS best interests. "Wait a minute," I objected. "I have his best interests in mind too. I want him to continue to have the opportunity to explore his issues in counseling and if the only way he'll do that is if the court orders it, so be it." I figure about the best I can do is facilitate his having the opportunity to work on his challenges. That's about all I CAN do at this point. So I guess I'll be talking to the DA. Son says he'd rather go to jail than continue mental health treatment. What an idiot. ________________________ Depressive symptoms: showed up before hospitalization last June. He's been a troubled young man for... a long long time. I had him psychologically evaluated by the school in another state after his bio-father dropped off the earth (ok, Japan) and he started pathologically lying. Actually that was about 2 years after he started having these fits. He would come home from school (2nd grade) and start cussing at me and trying to hurt me. Now, this is a kid who never swore, but he was using the most profane and violent language. And he was trying to bite me and claw me. Anything. He told me once that he was going to get a knife out of the kitchen and stab me and his little brother while we were sleeping. I guess I've been afraid of my son every since he was 7. Anyway, in 4th grade, the nice young girl with the dept of ed. said he was perfectly fine. The lying got worse. And I wanted to take him to counseling, but I was afraid he'd get me arrested. Besides, the nice doctor lady said he was acting appropriate for the life circumstances and everything was fine. I regret not having the guts to put in in therapy for another 5 years. He started skipping class and led some acquaintances to believe he was suicidal and had a knife at school in 9th grade. The school called me solely because they had to search his wheelchair and backpack. Otherwise they wouldn't have? What's up with that? So.... I don't think his mood issues are a function of his antidepressants. ___________________ The Seroquel still seems to be helping, but not as magically as those first days. _______________ I already know about baking soda, soaks, vinegar, essential oils.... for urine smells. It's my experience that I've got a much better chance of having fresh laundry if it's cotton. Once a smell gets in synthetic fibers, forget about it. My boyfriend has gym clothes that he washed with scented fabric softener before we started dating over 1 1/2 years ago, and to me they still reek. Yucky chemical smell. ew. _____________ I've started my second summer school class. I'll graduate next spring. Wed. this week was the second day. I started panicking before class and went outside to cry. I called my boyfriend and he said all the right things. He assured me that my son would be ok, eventually and that things would iron out and all that. I don't care if it's plausible, sometimes I just need the hope. If he didn't have challenged kids, Autism and probable bi-polar daughter, I don't think he'd have the stomach for our load of ****. After court today, I felt totally emotionally drained and of course son was pitching a hissy because I won't entertain the notion of his friend sleeping over this weekend. "How about you do chores every day for a week, then ask me," I suggested. Well, he said he was going to try and die as soon as possible, and he was leaving the house without his leg brace or shoe on his right foot (he has an open sore that is not looking too good and is irritated by his appliance) and he didn't want to take the wheelchair, because it is one he's borrowing from a friend and he wasn't planning on coming back home. As you can imagine this all made me feel super. I was able to get him to agree to come home by 7pm and make an effort to be safe. My other son is spending the night at a friends' and by boyfriend and his son are camping tonight. So I went over to my neighbor's house and asked her, "Can I ask you kind of a personal favor?" "Will you give me a hug?" I started crying and she gave me a hug. We talked about how our sucky cable co. hasn't come through with repairing storm damage yet (it had been like 20 hours - come on people, we've got the net to surf and quality cable programs to watch!!!) and I told her about legal stuff. Don't you ever feel like you wish your life bored someone? [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
hi everyone, my life in a big nutshell
Top