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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 329595" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>I agree with TM, I do think autism needs to be given strong consideration. It would explain everything you've described. Everything.</p><p></p><p>There could also be other explanations, plus we can't diagnose here - nobody could, especially not without seeing the child personally, not without testing and not without someone who is a professional doing the examination.</p><p>But aside from that - yep. sounds like high-functioning autism to me.</p><p></p><p>Which if it is - would be GOOD news. After all, you know something is wrong already. This isn't bad parenting. Something else is going on. But if it's autism, it explains a great deal, it's not because you have a bad child, it's not because he is deliberately choosing to be difficult But for him, the world is a frustrating, confusing, infuriating place that simply doesn't behave predictably or according to any rules he can comprehend. People do things he doesn't understand and then get angry with him for reasons he can't fully fathom. The language delay is a part of the package, so is anxiety and raging. ADHD - yep, our kids have that as part of their package as well.</p><p></p><p>Something we found with difficult child 3 (the only one of our autistic/Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids to have language delay) was that medications for the ADHD suddenly helped his language to dramatically improve. difficult child 3 was only 3 when he began taking dexamphetamine for the ADHD. It may not work like that for other kids but it is something to consider.</p><p></p><p>The behaviour/raging issues - get "The Explosive Child". It will help you see your child in a different (and probably healthier, less scary) light andhelp you find a better way through to handlnig him. These kids not only do not respond to the usual (generally effective) parenting techniques, but actually worsen. These kids simply don't learn the same way. You need to find a better way. The aim is to help them learn - anything else doesn't matter. Discipline is for learning. Punishment generally is a bad idea since to the socially inept child it only looks like revenge. These kids learn by observing and copying, so YOU have to behave in the way you want him to behave. That means YOU have to not be the authority figure, or HE will try to be an authority figure! I'm not kidding - don't set yourself up for that one!</p><p></p><p>There are some really good things about autism, that can actually give you a head start in parenting. A lot of hurdles ahead of other parents will never be as difficult for you. </p><p></p><p>I hope you can find some answers along this path. Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) in some form may well be the end result. Or it could be something different - but always keep an open mind. Especially when our kdis are young, it is easy to get the diagnosis wrong.</p><p></p><p>For your own consideration - go to <a href="http://www.childbrain.com" target="_blank">www.childbrain.com</a> and look for the Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) questionnaire. Do it on your son and even if it scores him as normal, print it out and show it to the docs, see what they say. If nothing else it gets all the issues of concern together on one piece of paper. The online test of course can't be used for an official diagnosis, but it can certainly help you see the possibilities.</p><p></p><p>Good luck, let us know how you get on.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 329595, member: 1991"] I agree with TM, I do think autism needs to be given strong consideration. It would explain everything you've described. Everything. There could also be other explanations, plus we can't diagnose here - nobody could, especially not without seeing the child personally, not without testing and not without someone who is a professional doing the examination. But aside from that - yep. sounds like high-functioning autism to me. Which if it is - would be GOOD news. After all, you know something is wrong already. This isn't bad parenting. Something else is going on. But if it's autism, it explains a great deal, it's not because you have a bad child, it's not because he is deliberately choosing to be difficult But for him, the world is a frustrating, confusing, infuriating place that simply doesn't behave predictably or according to any rules he can comprehend. People do things he doesn't understand and then get angry with him for reasons he can't fully fathom. The language delay is a part of the package, so is anxiety and raging. ADHD - yep, our kids have that as part of their package as well. Something we found with difficult child 3 (the only one of our autistic/Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids to have language delay) was that medications for the ADHD suddenly helped his language to dramatically improve. difficult child 3 was only 3 when he began taking dexamphetamine for the ADHD. It may not work like that for other kids but it is something to consider. The behaviour/raging issues - get "The Explosive Child". It will help you see your child in a different (and probably healthier, less scary) light andhelp you find a better way through to handlnig him. These kids not only do not respond to the usual (generally effective) parenting techniques, but actually worsen. These kids simply don't learn the same way. You need to find a better way. The aim is to help them learn - anything else doesn't matter. Discipline is for learning. Punishment generally is a bad idea since to the socially inept child it only looks like revenge. These kids learn by observing and copying, so YOU have to behave in the way you want him to behave. That means YOU have to not be the authority figure, or HE will try to be an authority figure! I'm not kidding - don't set yourself up for that one! There are some really good things about autism, that can actually give you a head start in parenting. A lot of hurdles ahead of other parents will never be as difficult for you. I hope you can find some answers along this path. Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) in some form may well be the end result. Or it could be something different - but always keep an open mind. Especially when our kdis are young, it is easy to get the diagnosis wrong. For your own consideration - go to [url]www.childbrain.com[/url] and look for the Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) questionnaire. Do it on your son and even if it scores him as normal, print it out and show it to the docs, see what they say. If nothing else it gets all the issues of concern together on one piece of paper. The online test of course can't be used for an official diagnosis, but it can certainly help you see the possibilities. Good luck, let us know how you get on. Marg [/QUOTE]
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