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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 708649" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Crayola what you say is so wise and compassionate and powerful.</p><p></p><p>My son has always been the kindest and most compassionate of people. So loving. Decent and moral. </p><p></p><p>He is 28 now and our worst troubles began when he was 18. He became hostile and lost to me.</p><p></p><p>Later he said, he had never stopped loving me but that he could not for a long time love himself.</p><p></p><p>He is becoming himself again more and more.</p><p></p><p>When he went "into the wilderness" I went with him. I became lost to myself. I cut off my kindness and compassion. I became furious. I felt abandoned. I tried to deal with this loss (and still do) through over-controlling. Because I panic. Still.</p><p></p><p>If I had one thing to say to a mother, 10 years back in the journey, that I wish I had known, the place where I wish I had had the courage to be, and to act from--it would be this: Our children are our beloveds still. Have faith. They will return. They are not lost to us. They will be found. By themselves. They will find themselves. For now, as we wait, they are to be found in our hearts. To abandon them there is to abandon ourselves.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 708649, member: 18958"] Crayola what you say is so wise and compassionate and powerful. My son has always been the kindest and most compassionate of people. So loving. Decent and moral. He is 28 now and our worst troubles began when he was 18. He became hostile and lost to me. Later he said, he had never stopped loving me but that he could not for a long time love himself. He is becoming himself again more and more. When he went "into the wilderness" I went with him. I became lost to myself. I cut off my kindness and compassion. I became furious. I felt abandoned. I tried to deal with this loss (and still do) through over-controlling. Because I panic. Still. If I had one thing to say to a mother, 10 years back in the journey, that I wish I had known, the place where I wish I had had the courage to be, and to act from--it would be this: Our children are our beloveds still. Have faith. They will return. They are not lost to us. They will be found. By themselves. They will find themselves. For now, as we wait, they are to be found in our hearts. To abandon them there is to abandon ourselves. [/QUOTE]
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