Holding back and trying to let go

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by tryingtobestrong, Sep 23, 2018.

  1. So, AS was discharged today from the treatment facility after 30 days.
    I want to remind him to eat healthy and don't go back to not eating... I want to ask him if he is going to AA meetings....
    UGH!
    I know I have to let go. This is his life. His choice if he wants to go back down that road. He was so proud of his 30 day sober chip so I am praying he won't think about returning to that life.


    Thanks for letting me vent
     
    Last edited: Oct 9, 2018
  2. B’smom

    B’smom Member

    I don’t have any experience in this as my children are still too young. But I do understand how hard it is to face the fact that you have to let them make their own decisions, despite knowing it’s going to be a mistake. You’re not alone, you’ve got this! I hope him all the best on his journey towards recovery. I hope that he can stick with it and continue to have pride in his success.

    I don’t know your story, would it be possible to do it in a less invasive way? Offer to have him over for supper or bring him a meal? I’m not sure what your history is with him and if this would be a realistic option.
     
  3. Elsi

    Elsi Active Member

    Trying, I Think this is the hardest part. Waiting and not knowing. Realizing we have no control and no say in their choices. I hope and pray you’ll hear from him soon, and he is making good choices. No words of wisdom tonight, but sending hugs and good wishes.
     
  4. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    Sending prayers and hope to you and your son!

    It's been a very long journey for us thus far.

    I hope that you do not have to go through this for as long as we have.

    Just take good care of yourself.
     
  5. Just wanted to tell you all that he did make contact last night. Got himself in a predicament while trying to help someone he knew from detox that relapsed. He said he was strong and spiritually okay so helping them pour away their booze went fine for him. This morning he was very depressed but I told him one he gets back to work he should start feeling better being among people. He said everyone at work was happy to see him so I think that made him feel good. He did call upset over the cost of his prescriptions... He said he won't take his pills anymore if it will cost this much.... I reminded him how much he spend on booze and weed and this wasn't even near that. So we will see. We are helping him pay for his transportation to and from his meetings and IOP because that is part of his recovery and he is really tight on cash with how he has his credit cards maxed. i explained we can't pay for everything and he needs to have a responsibility in this as well. He said he agreed.
     
  6. Nature

    Nature Active Member

    You weren't venting you were thinking out loud. The majority of us have heard that conversation many times in our own heads. If only our children knew the torment we go through when we don't hear from them. Yes, it is their lives but we can't help but continue to love them.

    I hope your mind will soon be put at ease. Anytime you feel the need to be heard...I'm listening.

    Hugs from me.