Holidays are always a difficult time

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Nancy, Dec 22, 2008.

  1. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    And this one is no different. difficult child seems to go out of her way to be ugly and **** all the happiness and joy right out of the season.

    I told her today that I was so sorry that she was so angry and bitter.

  2. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    difficult children and holidays are always a pain. Sorry that she's so true to form. I usually experience this also. This year, isn't quite as bad as past years, for us, since she's on new medications, but I do feel your pain, as I'm sure many of the rest of us do.

    And the wonderful thing to top it off....she's home for a whole week, until school starts up again!! YAY (not)
  3. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    Don't they s**k the joy and happiness out of EVERYTHING??? LOL :)
  4. Nomad

    Nomad Guest

    Hang in there Nancy.
    I hear ya. I understand ya. been there done that. ETC.
    So far, it hasn't been toooo bad.
    But I am hypervigilent.
    Can't help it. Decade + has put me in this place.
    We (the three of us) have already seen the rumblings.
    Ya know, for the past ten days I have been going around like a Santa's helper or something trying to bring joy to many....
    However...the truth is that almost all of my Christmas Days are difficult due to difficult child stress.
    I DO try to enjoy other aspects of my life (all year long) and make the best of the day. This has been helpful. (However, I am human....I know the loss and it is hard).
    This year, we are having friends come over for a little while...and I think this might help. MIGHT. difficult child has already backed out of church AGAIN and coming over at all for Christmas Eve. We are not arguing...just hoping the actual day goes well often does not.
  5. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I remember thinking of Miss KT as the "marplot" because she always managed to be as awful as possible for holidays or anything fun. I'm still on edge, waiting to see what might happen this year.
  6. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Haha I just noticed they edited su*k out. I remember that was one of Fran's favorite sayings. Who knew she was being profane.

    I knew a lot of us could relate to what I'm dealing with here.

    I am reduced to thanking her today for not slamming her bedroom door. It's been slammed and the moulding has been renailed so many times that it didn't close anymore and the hinge was hanging off. I had to unscrew the hinge, fill the holes with wood filler and rescrew it to the wall. It's very fragile and just won't stand up to any more abuse.

  7. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    Rofl, I noticed I have been a little loose with the speech lately. I apologize but sometimes I forget.

    Nancy, isn't it too sad that difficult child can't allow herself to enjoy or her family to enjoy the season. My dad was a difficult child during the holidays. He never seemed to handle all the hype or the change in routine. He was horrid and ruined every holiday at least once.

    Hope you have a good holiday despite her need to make you, husband and easy child suffer.
  8. Jena

    Jena New Member


    Late to this but wanted to send some support and say yes I it is alot of fun with our difficult child's during the holiday season :)
  9. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Haha Fran, if I remember correctly you use to say "difficult child could **** the life out of a room" and that is exaclty what it felt like for me.

    Yes it is sad that she can't allow herself to enoy her family and insists on ruining every holiday. In his younger years, when I was young, my dad also ruined every holiday. I am destined to have that be my lot in life until I can get her out onm her own and change the locks. I often thought it was ironic that as a child I hated holidays because of how my Dad acted and I vowed when I got married things would be different. I married a wonderful man and for years before kids I thought I finally broke that cycle. And here I am living the same life I did as a child. Doesn't seem fair does it?

  10. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Sorry- I'm late to this, too. It is rough at the holidays for us parents of difficult child's. I don't know why. I wish I could say something to make it easy for and let it out- know we are here. ((HUGS)) Try to detach from her mood and attitude and just go hide for a while in your room or bathroom or whatever it takes. It hoovers sometimes-