navineja
New Member
I am so frustrated over homework issues that I just want to scream- and they are only in 1st grade! We have tried so many things- rewards, discipline, ignoring the tantrum, letting the teacher handle it, etc. Yet still every night, N fusses and whines and tantrums and begs for me to give her the answers and... (you get the idea). She ends up loosing out on so much play time and fun stuff, which just makes her angrier.
Yesterday after school, we had plans to go to my sister's so the twins could play with their cousins. I told the girls that they needed to do their work with NO problems if they wanted to stay. J started to act up but a reminder quickly ended that for her. N however just kept it up, despite reminders, and when the crying started, I told her that it was time to go. (J stayed since she cooperated.) Then the problems really began. The crying and the dirty looks and the begging for "just one more chance". I lost it (BAAAAADDD mommy) and yelled at her, then smacked her. (Now of course I feel rotten) Long story short, When we got home, she cooperated with the original homework, did some extra that was needed to make sure that she understood what she was working on and showed self control even when I could see that she was about to start acting up again.
Since she did so well at home, I did end up taking her back to my sister's for the evening. (I wanted to go to- I needed the adult company- and I think that I wanted to soothe my conscience for yelling at her!) She was very well behaved all evening.
But I know that I cannot face this homework battle every day for the next 11 years! She admits that she just doesn't want to do it and that she wants me to just give her the answers. I try to reason with her that it is not going to go away, I am not going to give her the answers, she is loosing out, all that stuff- but still no success. HEEEEELLLLPPPP, please! I need ideas and I will try just about anything. TIA.
Yesterday after school, we had plans to go to my sister's so the twins could play with their cousins. I told the girls that they needed to do their work with NO problems if they wanted to stay. J started to act up but a reminder quickly ended that for her. N however just kept it up, despite reminders, and when the crying started, I told her that it was time to go. (J stayed since she cooperated.) Then the problems really began. The crying and the dirty looks and the begging for "just one more chance". I lost it (BAAAAADDD mommy) and yelled at her, then smacked her. (Now of course I feel rotten) Long story short, When we got home, she cooperated with the original homework, did some extra that was needed to make sure that she understood what she was working on and showed self control even when I could see that she was about to start acting up again.
Since she did so well at home, I did end up taking her back to my sister's for the evening. (I wanted to go to- I needed the adult company- and I think that I wanted to soothe my conscience for yelling at her!) She was very well behaved all evening.
But I know that I cannot face this homework battle every day for the next 11 years! She admits that she just doesn't want to do it and that she wants me to just give her the answers. I try to reason with her that it is not going to go away, I am not going to give her the answers, she is loosing out, all that stuff- but still no success. HEEEEELLLLPPPP, please! I need ideas and I will try just about anything. TIA.