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How do you deal with an ex who won't leave you alone?
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 558808" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>If your son is NOT already? I would HIGHLY suggest that the time he has his son schedule an hour or two for FAMILY therapy meaning HE AND SON together counseling and then SON alone therapy. He does not need the ex's permission to do this and it would benefit your son in learning how to deal with a manipulative ex ie: whispers to son "get off the phone with daddy, get involved with football when son doesn't want to, gets a boyfriend when he's not ready to deal with moving on yet, wanting to have an amicable divorce after lifestyle when she is wanting to make life difficult either on her own or through the child." The tools he will learn from a therapist AND the anger management skills his son will gain from going to a therapist will help him cope when he has to deal with the junk he's feeling from BOTH parents. Sorry - but right now? That kid is angry at both of them no matter HOW good one parent may be, or he may be blaming himself - and don't waste your breath asking -he'll never tell you. He may not even know he feels what he feels. </p><p></p><p>Also? When he DOES go for custody? It will go a LONG way to say to a judge.......Well your honor.......I go to therapy, I take me and my son to therapy and I make sure my SON gets to therapy. And I know this -----because.....it's what I said when I went. And no one can argue with the fact that you're all "therapied" up......and trying to be the best you can be for yourself, for your family and get your kid back on track. And they will ask -----"and what is SHE doing?" ------well she has a boyfriend, and is manipulating. Understand? </p><p></p><p>It's the best advice I can offer. Because in order to "BATTLE" things that you don't know HOW to fight? You have to go to a COACH that can ADVISE you HOW to fight SMART......and that is what a therapist does. Teaches you how to fight fair, fight smart.......and how to level the playing field and deal with things you haven't dealt with before. Instead of making mistakes based on emotion and guess work. </p><p></p><p>Hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 558808, member: 4964"] If your son is NOT already? I would HIGHLY suggest that the time he has his son schedule an hour or two for FAMILY therapy meaning HE AND SON together counseling and then SON alone therapy. He does not need the ex's permission to do this and it would benefit your son in learning how to deal with a manipulative ex ie: whispers to son "get off the phone with daddy, get involved with football when son doesn't want to, gets a boyfriend when he's not ready to deal with moving on yet, wanting to have an amicable divorce after lifestyle when she is wanting to make life difficult either on her own or through the child." The tools he will learn from a therapist AND the anger management skills his son will gain from going to a therapist will help him cope when he has to deal with the junk he's feeling from BOTH parents. Sorry - but right now? That kid is angry at both of them no matter HOW good one parent may be, or he may be blaming himself - and don't waste your breath asking -he'll never tell you. He may not even know he feels what he feels. Also? When he DOES go for custody? It will go a LONG way to say to a judge.......Well your honor.......I go to therapy, I take me and my son to therapy and I make sure my SON gets to therapy. And I know this -----because.....it's what I said when I went. And no one can argue with the fact that you're all "therapied" up......and trying to be the best you can be for yourself, for your family and get your kid back on track. And they will ask -----"and what is SHE doing?" ------well she has a boyfriend, and is manipulating. Understand? It's the best advice I can offer. Because in order to "BATTLE" things that you don't know HOW to fight? You have to go to a COACH that can ADVISE you HOW to fight SMART......and that is what a therapist does. Teaches you how to fight fair, fight smart.......and how to level the playing field and deal with things you haven't dealt with before. Instead of making mistakes based on emotion and guess work. Hugs [/QUOTE]
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How do you deal with an ex who won't leave you alone?
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