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How do you take my daughter's reaction to finding out a friend did drugs?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 309372" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>This is the first time I've never been worried about N. and drugs. Oh, I am 100% positive she isn't using any or even drinking. She doesn't go to parties and her life is saturated with sports, and she just isn't showing signs of dabbling. But this happened and I'd like your feedback. Names changed.</p><p></p><p>I found out that there had been a kid busted for having drugs in his locker.</p><p></p><p>Me: Who got busted for drugs?</p><p></p><p>Her: Oh, it was Sam. It's because Tyler told on him. That was so dorky of Tyler. Sam wasn't doing it in school.</p><p></p><p>I gulped than asked.</p><p></p><p>Me: So you don't think he should have told anyone?</p><p></p><p>Her: No, it's none of his business. He's a nerd.</p><p></p><p>Me: You wouldn't tell if a friend of yours took drugs?</p><p></p><p>Her: (shrug)</p><p></p><p>Me: Is Sam a friend of yours?</p><p></p><p>Her: Well, we don't hang out together, but he's sort of a friend at school.</p><p></p><p>Me; What drugs did they find?</p><p></p><p>Her: I don't know. I don't care. I don't want to talk about it.</p><p></p><p>(She stomps upstairs)</p><p></p><p>When I try to engage her in a "why drugs are bad talk" later, she rolls her eyes and goes, "Duh." </p><p></p><p>This bothers me, yet I have read over and over again that our kids ARE going to be in contact with kids who drink, take drugs and have early sex. There is no way to avoid that. And that overreacting can make things worse. </p><p></p><p>My daughter is thirteen and has never been in trouble. She has a pleasant temperament most of the time. I don't believe most of her close friends are in any sort of trouble. She is very social and knows a wide variety of kids.</p><p></p><p>Would you worry? Would you talk about it? If so, what would you say? I tend to come on like a Mack truck. Before this conversation, she had always acted like she thought drugs were stupid and she'd never try them. She still didn't say it was a smart thing to do. What bothered me was that she thought it was dumb of the other kid to tell on Sam.</p><p></p><p>My daughter is thirteen, very active in many activities, and concerned with her social status, although she is well liked.</p><p></p><p>I don't want to act like a ninny and freak out in advance. She has no mental illness. She does have learning disabilities. She is adopted and her birthfather is a drug addict. Maybe I should remind her that she is more prone to addiction than other kids. On the other hand, again, I don't want to get too wordy and make her afraid to tell me what she's thinking.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 309372, member: 1550"] This is the first time I've never been worried about N. and drugs. Oh, I am 100% positive she isn't using any or even drinking. She doesn't go to parties and her life is saturated with sports, and she just isn't showing signs of dabbling. But this happened and I'd like your feedback. Names changed. I found out that there had been a kid busted for having drugs in his locker. Me: Who got busted for drugs? Her: Oh, it was Sam. It's because Tyler told on him. That was so dorky of Tyler. Sam wasn't doing it in school. I gulped than asked. Me: So you don't think he should have told anyone? Her: No, it's none of his business. He's a nerd. Me: You wouldn't tell if a friend of yours took drugs? Her: (shrug) Me: Is Sam a friend of yours? Her: Well, we don't hang out together, but he's sort of a friend at school. Me; What drugs did they find? Her: I don't know. I don't care. I don't want to talk about it. (She stomps upstairs) When I try to engage her in a "why drugs are bad talk" later, she rolls her eyes and goes, "Duh." This bothers me, yet I have read over and over again that our kids ARE going to be in contact with kids who drink, take drugs and have early sex. There is no way to avoid that. And that overreacting can make things worse. My daughter is thirteen and has never been in trouble. She has a pleasant temperament most of the time. I don't believe most of her close friends are in any sort of trouble. She is very social and knows a wide variety of kids. Would you worry? Would you talk about it? If so, what would you say? I tend to come on like a Mack truck. Before this conversation, she had always acted like she thought drugs were stupid and she'd never try them. She still didn't say it was a smart thing to do. What bothered me was that she thought it was dumb of the other kid to tell on Sam. My daughter is thirteen, very active in many activities, and concerned with her social status, although she is well liked. I don't want to act like a ninny and freak out in advance. She has no mental illness. She does have learning disabilities. She is adopted and her birthfather is a drug addict. Maybe I should remind her that she is more prone to addiction than other kids. On the other hand, again, I don't want to get too wordy and make her afraid to tell me what she's thinking. [/QUOTE]
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