Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
how often do you talk to your difficult "child" now adult?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 737860" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I thought he was living with the parents and paying rent. Did I get that wrong?</p><p></p><p>Nomad. What happened about the elderly friend whose condo you were helping him sell, that had the bugs? What did you do? How is he?</p><p></p><p>I am not having any contact with my son. I am on the verge of obtaining a restraining order. He was squatting in the yard of our other property and would not leave. Recently, because he thought we were holding a quantity of marijuana he pushed his way into our house. I found myself pushing him out by banging his leg with a pot. Last week, when I went out to give the dogs water, it was a few moments before I realized he was asleep on the back lawn of my house. I was afraid. I demanded he leave.</p><p></p><p>He has no sense of how terrorized I am. Nor does he seem to care. The police have been to my house 4 times or more in the past 2 months. Several times it was because he would not leave. I understand that this has gotten so bad because I tried so hard. The more I tried, the more he didn't and felt entitled to even more.</p><p></p><p>Now, I am forced to see that there is no contact with him that is safe for me. Because I follow him down. I was a person of dignity and purpose. Around him, now, I am lost to myself. Hitting his legs with a pot, so that he cannot force his way in? (I did call the police--he told them he paid rent--and they asked why I did not let him stay....)</p><p></p><p>I miss him greatly. I wake every night at 230 or so, afraid and despondent. This is too much like my early life. But I do not foresee having contact with him.</p><p></p><p>I have no choice anymore. It is not so much what he does. It is where I go. I would have continued to go down the same road, had I not encountered masked, marauding robbers on the dark road. I was one of the robbers.</p><p></p><p>Not long ago I was the sherrif. Gary Cooper. I turned into Jack Palance. Too big a price. Nowhere more to fall. Much further down, I become an animal. Don't want to go there.</p><p></p><p>Nomad. Your daughter is doing well, in that she works with you. She is protecting what she has, instead of trashing it like my son.</p><p></p><p>Lil. Your son has a bottom line, which he is raising little by little. He has purpose and discipline. It is hard to even remember that this was the same volatile and entitled young man. My son has turned into this, although he is much older. He is living so badly that his beard greys one day to the next.</p><p></p><p>My task is to learn how to not feel that my life and I are defined by the disaster that has become my life as a mother. I try to look at it through a spiritual lens. It helps. But the sadness continues.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 737860, member: 18958"] I thought he was living with the parents and paying rent. Did I get that wrong? Nomad. What happened about the elderly friend whose condo you were helping him sell, that had the bugs? What did you do? How is he? I am not having any contact with my son. I am on the verge of obtaining a restraining order. He was squatting in the yard of our other property and would not leave. Recently, because he thought we were holding a quantity of marijuana he pushed his way into our house. I found myself pushing him out by banging his leg with a pot. Last week, when I went out to give the dogs water, it was a few moments before I realized he was asleep on the back lawn of my house. I was afraid. I demanded he leave. He has no sense of how terrorized I am. Nor does he seem to care. The police have been to my house 4 times or more in the past 2 months. Several times it was because he would not leave. I understand that this has gotten so bad because I tried so hard. The more I tried, the more he didn't and felt entitled to even more. Now, I am forced to see that there is no contact with him that is safe for me. Because I follow him down. I was a person of dignity and purpose. Around him, now, I am lost to myself. Hitting his legs with a pot, so that he cannot force his way in? (I did call the police--he told them he paid rent--and they asked why I did not let him stay....) I miss him greatly. I wake every night at 230 or so, afraid and despondent. This is too much like my early life. But I do not foresee having contact with him. I have no choice anymore. It is not so much what he does. It is where I go. I would have continued to go down the same road, had I not encountered masked, marauding robbers on the dark road. I was one of the robbers. Not long ago I was the sherrif. Gary Cooper. I turned into Jack Palance. Too big a price. Nowhere more to fall. Much further down, I become an animal. Don't want to go there. Nomad. Your daughter is doing well, in that she works with you. She is protecting what she has, instead of trashing it like my son. Lil. Your son has a bottom line, which he is raising little by little. He has purpose and discipline. It is hard to even remember that this was the same volatile and entitled young man. My son has turned into this, although he is much older. He is living so badly that his beard greys one day to the next. My task is to learn how to not feel that my life and I are defined by the disaster that has become my life as a mother. I try to look at it through a spiritual lens. It helps. But the sadness continues. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
how often do you talk to your difficult "child" now adult?
Top