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how to deal with other family members that enable
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 114588" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Well, I agree too that the letter shouldn't have been sent. The point is, you have no control over his treatment. At his age, it's up to him. I'm not sure what you want to talk to him about, but if it's trying to get him to do things your way, I think it will backfire. So far, sorry, but your way hasn't worked to change him. That's because you can't...you have no power to do that...in fact he can push you away for being too intrusive. His sponsor's credentials are his business, not yours. I'm also sorry to be harsh, but in my opinion it would be best if you kept your opinion out of it. Nothing is being done to this adult male that will damage him, except the things that he is doing to himself. I think sometimes our riding the adult kids can make them rebel and do just the opposite. He has to decide for himself to change his life. And he has to do it his way. You violated his confidence by telling the counselor things about your son that he may not have disclosed and I doubt he'll talk to you at all (the counselor) unless your son agrees to allow it. I would not have done that...jmo.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 114588, member: 1550"] Well, I agree too that the letter shouldn't have been sent. The point is, you have no control over his treatment. At his age, it's up to him. I'm not sure what you want to talk to him about, but if it's trying to get him to do things your way, I think it will backfire. So far, sorry, but your way hasn't worked to change him. That's because you can't...you have no power to do that...in fact he can push you away for being too intrusive. His sponsor's credentials are his business, not yours. I'm also sorry to be harsh, but in my opinion it would be best if you kept your opinion out of it. Nothing is being done to this adult male that will damage him, except the things that he is doing to himself. I think sometimes our riding the adult kids can make them rebel and do just the opposite. He has to decide for himself to change his life. And he has to do it his way. You violated his confidence by telling the counselor things about your son that he may not have disclosed and I doubt he'll talk to you at all (the counselor) unless your son agrees to allow it. I would not have done that...jmo. [/QUOTE]
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