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how to deal with other family members that enable
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<blockquote data-quote="jmama45" data-source="post: 114893" data-attributes="member: 4450"><p>We are have our own way of dealing with these things. I am sure you all do what you feel is right, so do I. I am sure my letter was a good thing :smile:</p><p></p><p>difficult child called me yesterday, he said the counselor pulled him aside after class and told him he recieved a letter from me (I gave him permission to do so) and that he was only half way through it and wanted to talk about it again later, BUT that he is there for him and will do what ever he can for him. He invited him to his AA meetings to try out too. My son was not mad at all, actually he was very happy with it and told me that he was making plans, that he wanted therapy when he got out and that it was long overdue. He talked about things he knew he had to do. He told me they taught him to not try to go it alone and that support from the people who loved him was what he needed. There is no doubt he knows my intention with the letter and welcomed it. I didn't push him away at all. My son knows he is loved by his family and he would never, even in his worst day, be mad at us for trying to reach him. He has been very open with his thoughts to me. He said he will be finding a sponsor for himself, but he will talk to that one she set up to get himself started. He is wide open to taking support. He can decide the details as he goes, he knows he has plenty of people to turn to when he has questions. He won't do what he doesn't want to do. He knows he is in the drivers seat.</p><p></p><p>The ultimate decisions are up to him. But he will have a clear set of options, what each can offer, and he can sift through them. The counselor will be able to help him figure out whats best for him, and give him advice through his knowledge, that is all I hoped for, and it worked out perfectly. :thumb:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jmama45, post: 114893, member: 4450"] We are have our own way of dealing with these things. I am sure you all do what you feel is right, so do I. I am sure my letter was a good thing [img]:smile:[/img] difficult child called me yesterday, he said the counselor pulled him aside after class and told him he recieved a letter from me (I gave him permission to do so) and that he was only half way through it and wanted to talk about it again later, BUT that he is there for him and will do what ever he can for him. He invited him to his AA meetings to try out too. My son was not mad at all, actually he was very happy with it and told me that he was making plans, that he wanted therapy when he got out and that it was long overdue. He talked about things he knew he had to do. He told me they taught him to not try to go it alone and that support from the people who loved him was what he needed. There is no doubt he knows my intention with the letter and welcomed it. I didn't push him away at all. My son knows he is loved by his family and he would never, even in his worst day, be mad at us for trying to reach him. He has been very open with his thoughts to me. He said he will be finding a sponsor for himself, but he will talk to that one she set up to get himself started. He is wide open to taking support. He can decide the details as he goes, he knows he has plenty of people to turn to when he has questions. He won't do what he doesn't want to do. He knows he is in the drivers seat. The ultimate decisions are up to him. But he will have a clear set of options, what each can offer, and he can sift through them. The counselor will be able to help him figure out whats best for him, and give him advice through his knowledge, that is all I hoped for, and it worked out perfectly. [img]:thumb:[/img] [/QUOTE]
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