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How to detach when grandkids are involved.
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 622045" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Hi End, I am sorry you are here but we understand and we will offer some thoughts for you to consider.</p><p></p><p>You sound done with your daughter. If you are done, and you are ready to take some steps, I would make some suggestions:</p><p></p><p>1. Decide if you are willing to try to get custody of your grandchildren or are willing to let them go with their mother or their father.</p><p>2. Because you have to get your daughter out of your house.</p><p></p><p>You can't have someone in your house who is stealing from you. That is a bottom line. So she has to go, either with or without the children.</p><p></p><p>Once you have some physical distance from her, you will start to feel better. </p><p></p><p>We do and we give and we try and we wait and we pray and then one day: we are done. We don't have it in us to do it any more, and you know, End, I have learned that <strong>that day</strong> is truly a good day all the way around for everybody. A very hard day, but a good day.</p><p></p><p>We stop trying to fix the unfixable, and we get out of the way, and we create some space and time for God to do something new and for our difficult child to do something new. It is scary and it is uncertain and it is a brand new way of living, and it is right. </p><p></p><p>I understand that your grandchildren are precious to you, and that is really your big decision. Only you can decide what needs to happen there, and either way, living with that decision will be hard. </p><p></p><p>I am so sorry about your daughter, and that she is 31 and doing these things she is doing. But unless and until she wants help, and is willing to work hard for a new and better life, you are doomed to living in the same situation you are in today, unless You. Say. No. More.</p><p></p><p>Hugs and prayers and good things I am wishing for you and your family tonight. Keep coming back. We care here.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 622045, member: 17542"] Hi End, I am sorry you are here but we understand and we will offer some thoughts for you to consider. You sound done with your daughter. If you are done, and you are ready to take some steps, I would make some suggestions: 1. Decide if you are willing to try to get custody of your grandchildren or are willing to let them go with their mother or their father. 2. Because you have to get your daughter out of your house. You can't have someone in your house who is stealing from you. That is a bottom line. So she has to go, either with or without the children. Once you have some physical distance from her, you will start to feel better. We do and we give and we try and we wait and we pray and then one day: we are done. We don't have it in us to do it any more, and you know, End, I have learned that [B]that day[/B] is truly a good day all the way around for everybody. A very hard day, but a good day. We stop trying to fix the unfixable, and we get out of the way, and we create some space and time for God to do something new and for our difficult child to do something new. It is scary and it is uncertain and it is a brand new way of living, and it is right. I understand that your grandchildren are precious to you, and that is really your big decision. Only you can decide what needs to happen there, and either way, living with that decision will be hard. I am so sorry about your daughter, and that she is 31 and doing these things she is doing. But unless and until she wants help, and is willing to work hard for a new and better life, you are doomed to living in the same situation you are in today, unless You. Say. No. More. Hugs and prayers and good things I am wishing for you and your family tonight. Keep coming back. We care here. [/QUOTE]
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