Hi,
Those of us who have been around some time on parenting boards can tell you about parents who professionaly worked with challenging children , were totally powerless and lost when they had to deal with their own children. In my experience it has been the been there done that , been there , done that , parent who has helped. The message here is that there is no magic bullet , but there is hope , education is a long process , so you need to nurture yourself.
I would say that you are following profesional advice , or being supported and advised by parents of challenging kids whose problems are neurologically - developmentally based. You are willing to share the book , articles etc with her and maybe she could help you get the most out of it. You are also recommended to have a buddy-tutor or other more democratic relationships for your child with older teenagers or young adults. By they becoming his confidants , he will open up , be more responsive to their words , and also develop important communication and cognitive skills. Most therapists were not trained this way , they need to make a paradigm shift.
Of course you can decide how much , you want her involved.
The less you complain , the better you cope, the happier and in control of your feelings , despite what is happening , she will interfere less.
Allan