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Huge breakthough yesterday
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<blockquote data-quote="skeeter" data-source="post: 83886" data-attributes="member: 439"><p>I had somewhat the same "epiphany" thanks to a dear friend and ex boss. I was complaining to him about my marriage, and he sent me the book "Co-Dependant No More". He told me he KNEW I was a strong, good person from working with me, but since he was now halfway across the company, he couldn't whap me up side the head to set me straight, so I had to read the book instead.</p><p></p><p>He was right. I WAS enabling my ex. In my mind, I "drew" my line in the sand that if the ex crossed it, our marriage was over. One of the things my ex has a problem with is stability. He had 8 jobs in 16 years of marriage. There's always that "better" thing, that job that will treat him better, or he'll get paid more, or he won't have to travel, or he will get to travel, or they'll listen to him - whatever. Of course, changing all those jobs ALSO meant changes in insurance, no retirement, etc.</p><p>That was my "line" - if he changed jobs yet again, I was going to divorce him.</p><p>When he decided, WITH NO INPUT FROM ME, to change jobs yet again, to one that would pay half what he was making and with no insurance, I said no more.</p><p></p><p>That was 9 years ago. He's changed jobs 2 more times since then, by the way. But it's no longer MY problem.</p><p></p><p></p><p>This WILL make you a stronger, better person. You will understand yourself better. You will know what is important to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="skeeter, post: 83886, member: 439"] I had somewhat the same "epiphany" thanks to a dear friend and ex boss. I was complaining to him about my marriage, and he sent me the book "Co-Dependant No More". He told me he KNEW I was a strong, good person from working with me, but since he was now halfway across the company, he couldn't whap me up side the head to set me straight, so I had to read the book instead. He was right. I WAS enabling my ex. In my mind, I "drew" my line in the sand that if the ex crossed it, our marriage was over. One of the things my ex has a problem with is stability. He had 8 jobs in 16 years of marriage. There's always that "better" thing, that job that will treat him better, or he'll get paid more, or he won't have to travel, or he will get to travel, or they'll listen to him - whatever. Of course, changing all those jobs ALSO meant changes in insurance, no retirement, etc. That was my "line" - if he changed jobs yet again, I was going to divorce him. When he decided, WITH NO INPUT FROM ME, to change jobs yet again, to one that would pay half what he was making and with no insurance, I said no more. That was 9 years ago. He's changed jobs 2 more times since then, by the way. But it's no longer MY problem. This WILL make you a stronger, better person. You will understand yourself better. You will know what is important to you. [/QUOTE]
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Huge breakthough yesterday
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