Since the school year started I haven't had time to post or reply, but I check in when I can and am so thankful for the members who take the time to share their experience, strength, and hope, as well as their struggles. There is so much collective wisdom and compassion. My update is that my 37 year old difficult undiagnosed daughter has cut me out of her and my two grandchildren's lives and says horrible things about me to them and to anyone else who will listen. Given her behavior, I don't want contact, but I do feel grief about how she is influencing my grandchildren. My difficult son is still in jail and blames me for his problems. His contact with me is always about wanting something. I am 64, working full-time, and have a younger son also who is in college and doing great. It's been a long, hard road, and although I am better at setting boundaries, my older two's mischaracterization of me and cruelty hurt. The holidays make it feel even sadder. My heart is with all of the parents who post here who deserve kindness and respect. Because you post here, I know you care about, love, and have tried to help your children. Although I will always love my two difficult, adult childre, I am learning to redirect my love to take care of myself and to those who appreciate it.