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Substance Abuse
husband and I have arrived at our decision
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<blockquote data-quote="garrison" data-source="post: 603300" data-attributes="member: 14316"><p>PG Congratulations! I would like to recommend taking up the in laws offer and seeing a lawyer now. Contacting the state before the child is born will give them time to do your home inspection and back ground checks before he is born. If this isn't done you run the risk of your grand going into foster care for a couple of months. The state will also look favorably on you for being proactive. Most states won't just say here you go have a baby. Even if you're the grandparent. They have to make sure it's a safe environment first. I had to prove I wasn't the cause of difficult child's problems.</p><p> Also I know you said you would not allow visits, but the state's first goal is reunification. (This pisses me off so bad!) If you tell the state you won't allow visitation, they may not let you have Connor. (The fact that Meth is involved may make this easier.) I'd like to share the best advice I've been given about raising your grand. Make your home "the safe place". Never have visitation at your home. <u>Always</u> meet your difficult child somewhere else. Do not make it easy. If she cant get a ride. No visit. If she's late, leave. If she brings friends, no visit. I messed this part up and it hurt Mr. I. If the difficult child's cant be responsible enough on their own for a visit then they don't need to be around the grand. </p><p> Also Keep a journal. Write down everything, in a spiral note book. They stand up better in court because you cant alter them. My journal has saved Mr. I. 3 times from being returned to a lying difficult child.</p><p> I so happy you made this choice. Raising my grand is one of the very best things I've ever experienced.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="garrison, post: 603300, member: 14316"] PG Congratulations! I would like to recommend taking up the in laws offer and seeing a lawyer now. Contacting the state before the child is born will give them time to do your home inspection and back ground checks before he is born. If this isn't done you run the risk of your grand going into foster care for a couple of months. The state will also look favorably on you for being proactive. Most states won't just say here you go have a baby. Even if you're the grandparent. They have to make sure it's a safe environment first. I had to prove I wasn't the cause of difficult child's problems. Also I know you said you would not allow visits, but the state's first goal is reunification. (This pisses me off so bad!) If you tell the state you won't allow visitation, they may not let you have Connor. (The fact that Meth is involved may make this easier.) I'd like to share the best advice I've been given about raising your grand. Make your home "the safe place". Never have visitation at your home. [U]Always[/U] meet your difficult child somewhere else. Do not make it easy. If she cant get a ride. No visit. If she's late, leave. If she brings friends, no visit. I messed this part up and it hurt Mr. I. If the difficult child's cant be responsible enough on their own for a visit then they don't need to be around the grand. Also Keep a journal. Write down everything, in a spiral note book. They stand up better in court because you cant alter them. My journal has saved Mr. I. 3 times from being returned to a lying difficult child. I so happy you made this choice. Raising my grand is one of the very best things I've ever experienced. [/QUOTE]
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