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husband - back
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<blockquote data-quote="skeeter" data-source="post: 269916" data-attributes="member: 439"><p>I had purchase our house - 3 years before we were married. We had one year left on the mortgage when I filed for divorce. I "let" him keep the house, and he refinanced half of it to give me as my half during the divorce (Ohio is a 50/50 state). Yes, it was tough letting go of that house. My dad and I had spent a lot of time remodeling it. But it hadn't been kept up during the 16 years of my marriage - and a house built in 1915 has to be constantly kept up. It was much better for me to start fresh. I used my "half" on a downpayment on a house less than 1/4 a mile away, so the kids could walk between the two, they didn't have to change schools, etc.</p><p></p><p>As to wanting kids to be in a 2 parent home - my kids (and my daughter in law) have come to me numerous times since and asked me how I actually stayed married to their father for as long as I did. Without me around to run interferance, they now "see" him in true form. They also have said knowing me and my husband has shown them what a true partnership is about. When my kids need advice, it's not their father they ask - it's us - and sadly their father still doesn't see that.</p><p></p><p>No matter what, you do NOT deserved to be hit by anyone. That is a huge flag to me that you need to do something, and that something is getting out of the situation.</p><p></p><p>Please take care of yourself. Let everyone else fend for themselves. Just pack and GO. There are extended stay hotels with kitchenettes, that are really fairly reasonable. Or as stated, go to a shelter. And go talk to a lawyer. You need to get the financial stuff straightened out NOW.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="skeeter, post: 269916, member: 439"] I had purchase our house - 3 years before we were married. We had one year left on the mortgage when I filed for divorce. I "let" him keep the house, and he refinanced half of it to give me as my half during the divorce (Ohio is a 50/50 state). Yes, it was tough letting go of that house. My dad and I had spent a lot of time remodeling it. But it hadn't been kept up during the 16 years of my marriage - and a house built in 1915 has to be constantly kept up. It was much better for me to start fresh. I used my "half" on a downpayment on a house less than 1/4 a mile away, so the kids could walk between the two, they didn't have to change schools, etc. As to wanting kids to be in a 2 parent home - my kids (and my daughter in law) have come to me numerous times since and asked me how I actually stayed married to their father for as long as I did. Without me around to run interferance, they now "see" him in true form. They also have said knowing me and my husband has shown them what a true partnership is about. When my kids need advice, it's not their father they ask - it's us - and sadly their father still doesn't see that. No matter what, you do NOT deserved to be hit by anyone. That is a huge flag to me that you need to do something, and that something is getting out of the situation. Please take care of yourself. Let everyone else fend for themselves. Just pack and GO. There are extended stay hotels with kitchenettes, that are really fairly reasonable. Or as stated, go to a shelter. And go talk to a lawyer. You need to get the financial stuff straightened out NOW. [/QUOTE]
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