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husband lied to me
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<blockquote data-quote="Jena" data-source="post: 407828" data-attributes="member: 4514"><p>i truly appreciate the friendships here. yes my house is under seige yet it's been going ok, i'm getting it al together cps or no cps. i really am. hard work does pay off and i've been doing it each and every day.</p><p> </p><p>my issue here is more than this one thing with-him and her. it's this ongoing thing that he does with-her. he has done this on more than one occassion. i need to know there will be an end if sight that this wont' keep repeating and it does.</p><p> </p><p>he did call me. he said well if you dont' trust me after all iv'e done for you and kids i have your back all the time than i dont' know what to say. did i make a mistake yes i did. why'd i do it you kept blaming her and i wanted to know the truth. i said what? as if you would get that from her? stupid he is. she cheated, lied and has been trying to break us up for years now.</p><p> </p><p>i said to him here's the problem at hand it's ok to make mistakes we'll both make them, **** eachother off, hurt eachother and its the love that we share that has to keep prevailing. yet when we make mistakes we have to learn from them not continue to repeat them. yet you keep repeating the same mistake over and over again with-the same exact woman.</p><p> </p><p>i told him i need you to figure out why it is you keep doing this to us? you keep hurting our marriage and trust by going to her and sharing with-her, answering to her. now you have given the one person in this town who hates me more than life ammo plain and simple that she will use against me when needed. so now you have made me living here harder by sharing something so incredibly personal with her. wrong wrong wrong</p><p> </p><p>he said i get if you want me to leave. yet he said you too have made mistakes there's alot of pressure here all the time what to say to her how to handle her according to you all the time. i'm tired of it. he said take your time think it thru let me know what you want from me this.</p><p> </p><p>i said moving forward i have to know that the lies will stop, that honesty will prevail without total honesty there is nothing. without honesty there is no trust at all. i have to know that when you tell me something i can count on your words to me as being truth credible. you now taught me i can't.</p><p> </p><p>so i have some thinking to do. i keep forgiving him, unconditionally loving him and he keeps making the same exact mistakes with the same exact woman and this one could potentially hurt difficult child and me now. i'm very upset with-him. i don't know where my mind will fall with this. honesty to me is crucial to a relationship.</p><p> </p><p>than he tells me he's wililng to explore in therapy why he keeps answering her if the "therapist" feels it's wrong. why he keeps jumping thru hoops of fire for her, why she is put first and i'm not. that's a real problem for me.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Jena, post: 407828, member: 4514"] i truly appreciate the friendships here. yes my house is under seige yet it's been going ok, i'm getting it al together cps or no cps. i really am. hard work does pay off and i've been doing it each and every day. my issue here is more than this one thing with-him and her. it's this ongoing thing that he does with-her. he has done this on more than one occassion. i need to know there will be an end if sight that this wont' keep repeating and it does. he did call me. he said well if you dont' trust me after all iv'e done for you and kids i have your back all the time than i dont' know what to say. did i make a mistake yes i did. why'd i do it you kept blaming her and i wanted to know the truth. i said what? as if you would get that from her? stupid he is. she cheated, lied and has been trying to break us up for years now. i said to him here's the problem at hand it's ok to make mistakes we'll both make them, **** eachother off, hurt eachother and its the love that we share that has to keep prevailing. yet when we make mistakes we have to learn from them not continue to repeat them. yet you keep repeating the same mistake over and over again with-the same exact woman. i told him i need you to figure out why it is you keep doing this to us? you keep hurting our marriage and trust by going to her and sharing with-her, answering to her. now you have given the one person in this town who hates me more than life ammo plain and simple that she will use against me when needed. so now you have made me living here harder by sharing something so incredibly personal with her. wrong wrong wrong he said i get if you want me to leave. yet he said you too have made mistakes there's alot of pressure here all the time what to say to her how to handle her according to you all the time. i'm tired of it. he said take your time think it thru let me know what you want from me this. i said moving forward i have to know that the lies will stop, that honesty will prevail without total honesty there is nothing. without honesty there is no trust at all. i have to know that when you tell me something i can count on your words to me as being truth credible. you now taught me i can't. so i have some thinking to do. i keep forgiving him, unconditionally loving him and he keeps making the same exact mistakes with the same exact woman and this one could potentially hurt difficult child and me now. i'm very upset with-him. i don't know where my mind will fall with this. honesty to me is crucial to a relationship. than he tells me he's wililng to explore in therapy why he keeps answering her if the "therapist" feels it's wrong. why he keeps jumping thru hoops of fire for her, why she is put first and i'm not. that's a real problem for me. [/QUOTE]
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