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Husband on his way home from VT
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 74322" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Karen,</p><p></p><p>It is very clear to me that he is as manipulative as many hope he isn't. He PLANNED this. Maybe not getting caught, but what to do if he did.</p><p></p><p>Tomorrow (MONDAY) you need to go see an attorney. You cannot put this off. Not if you want $$$ to send your daughter to school, to keep your retirement plans and health insurance, and to have any stability at all. I would not at all be surprised if the cabin was where he met up with prior other women. He may not WANT you to go there to see things. </p><p></p><p>You owe it to YOUR CHILDREN to get an attorney very very quickly. This man has shown you how manipulative he can be. You need to move as much $$$ out of any joint accounts as you can TOMORROW as soon as the banks open. Even if you have to take a day off work. </p><p></p><p>A close friend of mine was in a similar situation. Her husband kept saying he would take care of her no matter what. She is currently living with her 4 children in a friends basement. She was not "permitted" to work while married so had NO resources. OF course, lots of the interference with any job she would get was his erratic work hours. Which actually were 8-5, M-F. The "overtime" was actually his time with his women and at bars. With 4 kids she couldn't earn enough for a babysitter, so she was a stay at home mom.</p><p></p><p>I know you work full time, and can probably provide for yourself. But you have savings and things that he could clean out. As manipulative as he is, HE WILL. With no regard to your daughter's college plans, etc... </p><p></p><p>PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not agree to sell anything else, or sign anything else until you have an attorney. He probably already has one. If possible, ask friends who are divorced who their lawyer was. If they got a raw deal, ask who the spouse's lawyer was. At this point you need a shark.</p><p></p><p>Also, get an emergency appointment with your doctor for a full STD screening. You may very well want to add fees for medications and tests to what he owes you in the divorce. But either way, unless you get a full STD screening, including hepatitis and HIV, you run serious risks. Remember, he brought home whatever his partner and ALL their partners had. This is what we always tell our kids, and these diseases don't limit themselves to any age group.</p><p></p><p>Hugs,</p><p></p><p>Susie</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 74322, member: 1233"] Karen, It is very clear to me that he is as manipulative as many hope he isn't. He PLANNED this. Maybe not getting caught, but what to do if he did. Tomorrow (MONDAY) you need to go see an attorney. You cannot put this off. Not if you want $$$ to send your daughter to school, to keep your retirement plans and health insurance, and to have any stability at all. I would not at all be surprised if the cabin was where he met up with prior other women. He may not WANT you to go there to see things. You owe it to YOUR CHILDREN to get an attorney very very quickly. This man has shown you how manipulative he can be. You need to move as much $$$ out of any joint accounts as you can TOMORROW as soon as the banks open. Even if you have to take a day off work. A close friend of mine was in a similar situation. Her husband kept saying he would take care of her no matter what. She is currently living with her 4 children in a friends basement. She was not "permitted" to work while married so had NO resources. OF course, lots of the interference with any job she would get was his erratic work hours. Which actually were 8-5, M-F. The "overtime" was actually his time with his women and at bars. With 4 kids she couldn't earn enough for a babysitter, so she was a stay at home mom. I know you work full time, and can probably provide for yourself. But you have savings and things that he could clean out. As manipulative as he is, HE WILL. With no regard to your daughter's college plans, etc... PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not agree to sell anything else, or sign anything else until you have an attorney. He probably already has one. If possible, ask friends who are divorced who their lawyer was. If they got a raw deal, ask who the spouse's lawyer was. At this point you need a shark. Also, get an emergency appointment with your doctor for a full STD screening. You may very well want to add fees for medications and tests to what he owes you in the divorce. But either way, unless you get a full STD screening, including hepatitis and HIV, you run serious risks. Remember, he brought home whatever his partner and ALL their partners had. This is what we always tell our kids, and these diseases don't limit themselves to any age group. Hugs, Susie [/QUOTE]
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Husband on his way home from VT
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