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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 421667" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>We have a variation on the three items thing. We always shop with a shopping list and stick to it. The kids learned that if they want something they need, such as shampoo or deodorant, it has to go on the list. We have allowed them to ask for the list to write it down, but that is bending the rules. Once we enter the tore, technically even once we leave home, e should not allow this. The purpose - while we are at home, we can go and check to make sure we really need it, and not be buying extra. For example yesterday I remembered I had used a can of beans and could not remember if I had replaced it or not. So I bought another can, then when I got home realised I HAD previously replaced it. So now we have two cans of beans where I only needed one.</p><p></p><p>If the child wants something (as distinct from needs something) and we need to focus on reward, we allow ONE item to a certain value. We agree on this ahead of time, so it doesn't look like us giving way to an impulse. I also use the child in the supermarket to go find this, or fetch that. It keeps them too busy to focus on the crowds and bustle.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 421667, member: 1991"] We have a variation on the three items thing. We always shop with a shopping list and stick to it. The kids learned that if they want something they need, such as shampoo or deodorant, it has to go on the list. We have allowed them to ask for the list to write it down, but that is bending the rules. Once we enter the tore, technically even once we leave home, e should not allow this. The purpose - while we are at home, we can go and check to make sure we really need it, and not be buying extra. For example yesterday I remembered I had used a can of beans and could not remember if I had replaced it or not. So I bought another can, then when I got home realised I HAD previously replaced it. So now we have two cans of beans where I only needed one. If the child wants something (as distinct from needs something) and we need to focus on reward, we allow ONE item to a certain value. We agree on this ahead of time, so it doesn't look like us giving way to an impulse. I also use the child in the supermarket to go find this, or fetch that. It keeps them too busy to focus on the crowds and bustle. Marg [/QUOTE]
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