I'm stressed over difficult child and this sw shooting everything down today- she was negative about everything I said I'd heard. She said she used to work at processing those waivers for medicaid and that difficult child would not qualify for one. She said one reason was that he didn't already have a case manager. Well, if you aren't on medicaid I don't think it's possible to get a case manager. I don't know if there's a way to get any help. She said "I can see you're frustrated- I'll leave message for regular case manager to call you- maybe she'll have some ideas". So, I guess I'm supposed to look forward to going over all of this again - never mind that I've been going over it for 2 mos with half the people in the state. Then, what's she going to say? At this point, I'm convinced that no matter what any of them say, the next person I talk to will tell me why that idea won't work. Then we'll spend 15 mins discussing how this state svcks when it comes to helping families and those with mental health issues. But nothing will get resolved. One thing she did say that I found interesting- she said the school could recommend a Residential Treatment Center (RTC), day treatment, etc for difficult child through the iep team meeting. I knew that- what I found interesting is that she said the iep team recommends it, then it goes to the county team to get funding approved. Well, this appears to be what the principal was trying to say- that she couldn't just recommend something when difficult child hasn't had issues warranting it at school but we needed to have an iep meeting. Now, I'm thinking maybe the principal was not seeing that this is NOT what I was asking for. I was trying to hurry and get someone on board - the team- to have an informal brainstorming session about what supports could be provided to PREVENT Residential Treatment Center (RTC), out of home placement, etc. (This is what that coordinator told me to do) It is appearing now that this option never even occurred to the principal. Or she doesn't realize that she has that option- I don't know. This is reminding me more and more of last year when I was trying to deal with PO, GAL, and MST guy about difficult child's mental health treatment. They were so busy trying to tell me what they knew and what they would and wouldn't do and what they expected of me, that they wouldn't listen to a da** thing I was trying to tell them. Furthermore, they didn't know all they professed to either. But, I don't have the resources (time, money or emotionally) to go thru any more fights like that. I feel completely expended all the way around. I cringe at another person from this county acting like they are going to help, only to have them put more demands on me and threaten me legally if I don't comply. I'm tired of people pressuring me about what they think I should be doing regarding difficult child. I realized today that the regular sw called Friday and brought up the new medication again. When I said I wasn't sure and was waiting for psychiatrist to call me back. She sighed and said "well you do have him up here because you want him treated don't you". Of course, that was insinuating that I would be refusing treatment if I didn't consent to this medication. Then today, I remembered that is exactly how I ended up consenting to the prozac. It was this same sw who said the same thing to me almost 3 years ago when that psychiatrist suggested prozac. Maybe all these medications are the right answer, but I'm tired of feeling pressured into things. I think I have just reached a breaking point- between difficult child's legal issues, the custody fight last year, all the effort (3 years) to find a good therapist, dealing with the ignorance and dictatorship of the PO, dealing with this sd and their stalling when it comes to helping difficult child but over-reacting when it comes to disciplining him, the financial situation, and difficult child's instability. I think I have no more that I can give. If I tell the psychiatric hospital to just call social services and I'll work with someone if they can find someone who does have THE answers of what I should do instead of bouncing me from one person to another and from one theory to another on how to get help, and if they can get someone involved who actually helps instead of making more demands on me, that's fine. But, if they can't do that, then they just need to place difficult child in foster care. Will they charge me with abandonment when I've been visiting him and am the one who called cops and got him in there? I already told her today that if I bring him home and don't get help within a few weeks, we could be living out of the car. Then what? So, am I supposed to move in the car with him or just not go pick him up? And what fool came up with the concept that you solve the problem of a single mom needing help with an unstable difficult child by placing more demands on her? And if that cm from school emails me one more time about whether or not difficult child has completed his makeup work from all these days he's missed, I'm going to scream. I have emailed her several times and said he's going to need some one on one at school to learn this material and get some work done. I can't teach it to him and sending him home with a handful of worksheets isn't going to cut it. She responded once to those emails- it said one of his teachers could stay for about an hour one day after school, but that's all she could do. It's all whacked. It isn't all difficult child's fault. But I don't see the point of me fighting anymore- actually- I have nothing left to fight with. All I've done is fight one entity after another for almost 2 years now. Yes, I've won those fights, but then another battle pops up as soon as one is over. It has been this way continuously for 2 years. I don't think I can continue to live this way. Even if I could- I have nothing left to fight with. I told sw today, I exhausted all resources to keep difficult child home and to find and be allowed to use private mental health care. Now, I finally have that in place but can only take advantage of it if I can keep the private health insurance. I can't keep the insurance if I can't work and I can't work full time if I'm taking difficult child to therapist, psychiatrist, PO, iep mtgs, taking myself to therapist, etc. Sorry- this is just a sleepy rambling vent...If anyone made it this far- if you know what to expect if you just refuse to pick your kid up, please let me know. I don't know how else I can get them to take it seriously.