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Parent Emeritus
I finally threw her out
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<blockquote data-quote="joysheph" data-source="post: 744597" data-attributes="member: 21496"><p>Awe I feel for you cause I was not the perfect mom. I was young having a baby. We grew up together. Lord I made mistakes. Id drink, work lived with an abusive dad to my three boys. Boy did I ever felt guilty and did the blame game for my 29 year old sons addiction for at least 10 years. Until this last few years I started reaching out mainly on this website reading stories and learning from other parents to learn to take care of me. To stop enabling and living their circus full of drama. To start setting boundaries building my sanctuary loving my own company. I've been told time again we moms cant enable or we will love them to death. To their own grave if we dont cut them off and let them figure their circus.</p><p>I literally had to have no contact no calls texts or visits until I was strong enough to keep my boundaries to a full throttle. I've called the police 4 times for trespassing. Bought expensive cameras so I get alerted when he showed up on my property. I had to do this for about a year and half. I've been dealing with this constant drugging from my son for at least 8 years. Hes been homeless all that time. Until a few weeks before Thanksgiving he had the humbleness to want to get sober. I believe him this time so I let him sleep on the couch. All was good until a few days I found myself posting on here devastated. He had relapsed.</p><p>I decided I'm done hes out homeless sleeping in his car. My sanctuary is mine. Hes circus his addiction his sobriety not mine. I will love him from a far and not ask questions or give advice. I had offered resources for free rehabs, shelters, sober living, work programs. It's up to him. </p><p>I get your pain and heart full tears. Pl lease let her go and live your life. Build boundaries.set a phone reminder to go off every day to remind yourself of the boundaries. It's tough and it sucks but it gets easy. Prayers sent.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="joysheph, post: 744597, member: 21496"] Awe I feel for you cause I was not the perfect mom. I was young having a baby. We grew up together. Lord I made mistakes. Id drink, work lived with an abusive dad to my three boys. Boy did I ever felt guilty and did the blame game for my 29 year old sons addiction for at least 10 years. Until this last few years I started reaching out mainly on this website reading stories and learning from other parents to learn to take care of me. To stop enabling and living their circus full of drama. To start setting boundaries building my sanctuary loving my own company. I've been told time again we moms cant enable or we will love them to death. To their own grave if we dont cut them off and let them figure their circus. I literally had to have no contact no calls texts or visits until I was strong enough to keep my boundaries to a full throttle. I've called the police 4 times for trespassing. Bought expensive cameras so I get alerted when he showed up on my property. I had to do this for about a year and half. I've been dealing with this constant drugging from my son for at least 8 years. Hes been homeless all that time. Until a few weeks before Thanksgiving he had the humbleness to want to get sober. I believe him this time so I let him sleep on the couch. All was good until a few days I found myself posting on here devastated. He had relapsed. I decided I'm done hes out homeless sleeping in his car. My sanctuary is mine. Hes circus his addiction his sobriety not mine. I will love him from a far and not ask questions or give advice. I had offered resources for free rehabs, shelters, sober living, work programs. It's up to him. I get your pain and heart full tears. Pl lease let her go and live your life. Build boundaries.set a phone reminder to go off every day to remind yourself of the boundaries. It's tough and it sucks but it gets easy. Prayers sent. [/QUOTE]
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I finally threw her out
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