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<blockquote data-quote="WhymeMom?" data-source="post: 45387" data-attributes="member: 53"><p><span style='font-family: Comic Sans MS'>Well, I guess I looked at this differently so feel to discount my thoughts if they don't apply. Your son told you he didn't want this boy to come to his party. He repeated that sentiment several times. He told someone else the truth at the party and Mom overheard. In my opinion he was compassionate...he did not act upon his dislike of the other boy, such as hitting or saying he was bad, etc. I don't happen to like everyone I meet and even as charming as I am not everyone likes me, so I think you were asking a bit much of your 6 year old to accept the invitation because YOU felt sorry for difficult child and the MOM. Sometimes there is a fine line here too in that they don't share their true feelings with you and start telling you what they think you want to hear...... </p><p></p><p>I do feel that at age 6 it probably is a little young to feel empathy for another child. Still I think it would be difficult to chastise your son for his feelings on something that was forced on him. If the other difficult child was a relative that might be another story, but just someone from the neighborhood or an acquaintance I guess I wouldn't be too upset about what your son said. Don't know how many other kids/moms were at the party, but the way you described this it wasn't an announcement, just a casual comment made by your son to another child. I think the difficult child's mom was probably over sensitive because this has happened before (or she knows it will happen again). It does break your heart when you perceive someone is hurting your child, but she needs to learn to face what is going to happen in the future and perhaps toughen up a bit for the times to come. I'm not trying to be uncompassionate, I just don't think "forcing friendships" does much good. You have had chats with your son I'm sure about "how would you feel?", or "why don't you like him?" etc. so he's getting the picture, just isn't ready at 6 to think about others feelings at HIS birthday party. I mean birthday parties are all about the person having the birthday. </p><p></p><p>Hope you can resolve things with the other Mother, but wouldn't be asking for play dates with the kids....</span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="WhymeMom?, post: 45387, member: 53"] <span style='font-family: Comic Sans MS'>Well, I guess I looked at this differently so feel to discount my thoughts if they don't apply. Your son told you he didn't want this boy to come to his party. He repeated that sentiment several times. He told someone else the truth at the party and Mom overheard. In my opinion he was compassionate...he did not act upon his dislike of the other boy, such as hitting or saying he was bad, etc. I don't happen to like everyone I meet and even as charming as I am not everyone likes me, so I think you were asking a bit much of your 6 year old to accept the invitation because YOU felt sorry for difficult child and the MOM. Sometimes there is a fine line here too in that they don't share their true feelings with you and start telling you what they think you want to hear...... I do feel that at age 6 it probably is a little young to feel empathy for another child. Still I think it would be difficult to chastise your son for his feelings on something that was forced on him. If the other difficult child was a relative that might be another story, but just someone from the neighborhood or an acquaintance I guess I wouldn't be too upset about what your son said. Don't know how many other kids/moms were at the party, but the way you described this it wasn't an announcement, just a casual comment made by your son to another child. I think the difficult child's mom was probably over sensitive because this has happened before (or she knows it will happen again). It does break your heart when you perceive someone is hurting your child, but she needs to learn to face what is going to happen in the future and perhaps toughen up a bit for the times to come. I'm not trying to be uncompassionate, I just don't think "forcing friendships" does much good. You have had chats with your son I'm sure about "how would you feel?", or "why don't you like him?" etc. so he's getting the picture, just isn't ready at 6 to think about others feelings at HIS birthday party. I mean birthday parties are all about the person having the birthday. Hope you can resolve things with the other Mother, but wouldn't be asking for play dates with the kids....</span> [/QUOTE]
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