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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
I have elected to tell my son to get treatment and be sober before we talk again.
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 590662" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>I agree with TL. Tell him you love him and you do not want to have a relationship with him but that he has a drug/alcohol problem and has for years and that he needs to address.</p><p></p><p>At some point you may have to give up on his getting help, there are millions of addicts out there who do not get sober. I don't mean to suggest you allow him back into your life to disrupt it, but if he is clean and sober when he is around you, you may have to accept that, without enabling.</p><p></p><p>My daughter is still drinking. Is she an alcoholic? I believe she is because of her genetic background and the fact that she began drinking at 14 and was never able to stop once she started. Can she get along in society without crashing, I don't know. Her birthmother has even with her drinking problem. What I do know is I now have a decent relationship with her but I will not help her if she gets into trouble because of her drinking and I'm through trying to force her into treatment. We went that route just like you and it didn't work. As long as she isn;t drinking when she's around me she can come over and I will help her when she is doing the right things.</p><p></p><p>You may have to come to that point in your life. However do not allow him to pull you into his drama.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 590662, member: 59"] I agree with TL. Tell him you love him and you do not want to have a relationship with him but that he has a drug/alcohol problem and has for years and that he needs to address. At some point you may have to give up on his getting help, there are millions of addicts out there who do not get sober. I don't mean to suggest you allow him back into your life to disrupt it, but if he is clean and sober when he is around you, you may have to accept that, without enabling. My daughter is still drinking. Is she an alcoholic? I believe she is because of her genetic background and the fact that she began drinking at 14 and was never able to stop once she started. Can she get along in society without crashing, I don't know. Her birthmother has even with her drinking problem. What I do know is I now have a decent relationship with her but I will not help her if she gets into trouble because of her drinking and I'm through trying to force her into treatment. We went that route just like you and it didn't work. As long as she isn;t drinking when she's around me she can come over and I will help her when she is doing the right things. You may have to come to that point in your life. However do not allow him to pull you into his drama. [/QUOTE]
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I have elected to tell my son to get treatment and be sober before we talk again.
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