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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
I have elected to tell my son to get treatment and be sober before we talk again.
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<blockquote data-quote="kennedyland" data-source="post: 593604" data-attributes="member: 16133"><p>Well, backing down isn't an option. What I've done, by saying I'll talk to him, is throw the ball in his court and he's got a lot of dues to pay before things will ever be "normal". He needs to take responsibility for his own finances - something that won't happen because his mother caves in to his needs. He needs to apologize for the vile text messages he's sent and the language of a 12 year old spoiled little boy. Frankly, I doubt I will be hearing from him before I move away in five and a half weeks. While I called and left a message, and delivered a gift for his birthday,(two actions that have received no response) I'm done with indicating that I want to talk with him. I'm not apologizing for my position, and I'm not sorry for what I've been doing. I will not get sucked into an argument with him. I'll stay positive, I'll say I care (and I really do), and I'll hope he does something about all of this. I doubt things will change. He loves his drugs. He has never apologized for his choices. I can't take care of him. I can only take care of myself. It's really too bad. The rich, full life he could have is within his reach, but he doesn't want it. One irony is the fact that if I hadn't taken this position, I may not have heard from him in all this time anyway. He rarely responded to messages, and only called if he wanted something. What has changed is my approach to this whole thing. I said I'd talk to him to make peace with my daughter because she is pregnant. His lack of response is an indication that it's a lot of the same-old, same-old. At least I'm not sitting around stressed about all of this. I'm moving on.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="kennedyland, post: 593604, member: 16133"] Well, backing down isn't an option. What I've done, by saying I'll talk to him, is throw the ball in his court and he's got a lot of dues to pay before things will ever be "normal". He needs to take responsibility for his own finances - something that won't happen because his mother caves in to his needs. He needs to apologize for the vile text messages he's sent and the language of a 12 year old spoiled little boy. Frankly, I doubt I will be hearing from him before I move away in five and a half weeks. While I called and left a message, and delivered a gift for his birthday,(two actions that have received no response) I'm done with indicating that I want to talk with him. I'm not apologizing for my position, and I'm not sorry for what I've been doing. I will not get sucked into an argument with him. I'll stay positive, I'll say I care (and I really do), and I'll hope he does something about all of this. I doubt things will change. He loves his drugs. He has never apologized for his choices. I can't take care of him. I can only take care of myself. It's really too bad. The rich, full life he could have is within his reach, but he doesn't want it. One irony is the fact that if I hadn't taken this position, I may not have heard from him in all this time anyway. He rarely responded to messages, and only called if he wanted something. What has changed is my approach to this whole thing. I said I'd talk to him to make peace with my daughter because she is pregnant. His lack of response is an indication that it's a lot of the same-old, same-old. At least I'm not sitting around stressed about all of this. I'm moving on. [/QUOTE]
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I have elected to tell my son to get treatment and be sober before we talk again.
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