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Grace, I understand. Last Christmas watching my son walk down the street after getting some clothes and knowing that I had put him out at Christmas time was the saddest time of my life. Yes, he had hurt me but I loved him. It was cold outside and it was bleak. I sent him to the church shelter but he opted to go to his evil friends. husband and I revoked his bail to get him off the streets and he was in jail for the holiday on sucide watch. It was A nightmare for my family a real wide awake nightmare. It was drugs that put my family in that spot not the boy I had raised. The drugs that had taken him away. I look back and I know there was nothing I could have done differently. NOTHING. But it doesn't help the pain all that much. Now for the second Christmas in a row my son will be in jail. His actions put him there but how I wish he was free. Free to have dinner with his family. Free to hug and play with his neice and nephew. I do not want him under my roof but I want him in a happy place and to know he is loved. It is so hard on me. I will help him when he gets out in a few months. I pray everyday that he stays clean when he does. I want to take him home but I won't because I remember the chaos and I do not ever want to go there again. But I will help him because he will need it. I send you Hugs also. Our lives are different yet so much the same. -RM

<blockquote data-quote="rejectedmom" data-source="post: 6223" data-attributes="member: 2315"><p>Grace, I understand.&nbsp; Last Christmas watching my son walk down the street after getting some clothes and knowing that I had put him out at Christmas time was the saddest time of my life.&nbsp; Yes, he had hurt me but I loved him.&nbsp; It was cold outside and it was bleak.&nbsp; I sent him to the church shelter but he opted to go to his evil friends. husband and I revoked his bail to get him off the streets and he was in jail for the holiday on sucide watch.&nbsp; It was A nightmare for my family a real wide awake nightmare.&nbsp; It was drugs that put my family in that spot not the boy I had raised. The drugs that had taken him away.&nbsp; I look back and I know there was nothing I could have done differently.&nbsp; NOTHING.&nbsp; But it doesn't help the pain all that much.&nbsp; Now for the second Christmas in a row my son will be in jail.&nbsp; His actions put him there but how I wish he was free.&nbsp; Free to have dinner with his family.&nbsp; Free to hug and play with his neice and nephew.&nbsp; I do not want him under my roof but I want him in a happy place and to know he is loved.&nbsp; It is so hard on me.&nbsp;&nbsp; I will help him when he gets out in a few months.&nbsp; I pray everyday that he stays clean when he does.&nbsp; I want to take him home but I won't because I remember the chaos and I do not ever want to go there again.&nbsp; But I will help him because he will need it.&nbsp; I send you Hugs also.&nbsp; Our lives are different yet so much the same. -RM</p></blockquote><p></p>

[QUOTE="rejectedmom, post: 6223, member: 2315"] Grace, I understand. Last Christmas watching my son walk down the street after getting some clothes and knowing that I had put him out at Christmas time was the saddest time of my life. Yes, he had hurt me but I loved him. It was cold outside and it was bleak. I sent him to the church shelter but he opted to go to his evil friends. husband and I revoked his bail to get him off the streets and he was in jail for the holiday on sucide watch. It was A nightmare for my family a real wide awake nightmare. It was drugs that put my family in that spot not the boy I had raised. The drugs that had taken him away. I look back and I know there was nothing I could have done differently. NOTHING. But it doesn't help the pain all that much. Now for the second Christmas in a row my son will be in jail. His actions put him there but how I wish he was free. Free to have dinner with his family. Free to hug and play with his neice and nephew. I do not want him under my roof but I want him in a happy place and to know he is loved. It is so hard on me. I will help him when he gets out in a few months. I pray everyday that he stays clean when he does. I want to take him home but I won't because I remember the chaos and I do not ever want to go there again. But I will help him because he will need it. I send you Hugs also. Our lives are different yet so much the same. -RM [/QUOTE]

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