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The Watercooler
I knew it was a risk
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<blockquote data-quote="totoro" data-source="post: 222335" data-attributes="member: 3155"><p>This is a hard one. Because you signed on it it could be your problem, obviously. </p><p></p><p>But the whole thing about the giving. </p><p>Does it make you feel good? Do you give just to give, from your heart? </p><p></p><p>My mother in law gives and then kind of keeps a tally... I would not call that giving from the heart. She strives to be the matriarch of the family and desperately wants to be the puppet master. </p><p>She accounts for EVERY made up holiday and even makes them up! LOl</p><p></p><p>husband and I have given and loaned a lot. We gave a friend of his some money 2 years ago to start a Restaraunt in Chicago. We were going to see the money back in 6 months, then a year... have not seen it yet. But we fully talked about this prior to loaning it.</p><p>I have given my friends things and money to help get them through when I have had the money or things to do so. Never gave it a second thought. Sometimes I didn't even tell them who it was from. </p><p>I think no matter what your husband says , as long as you feel good about why and how you do it and it is not putting you in financial ruins.</p><p>Maybe you can explain why it makes you feel good to give.</p><p>Unless you think husband is correct??? </p><p>Of course we all want people to like/love us, but if we know they will without the gift, is the real question. </p><p>I don't know kind of rambling... coffee kicking in!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="totoro, post: 222335, member: 3155"] This is a hard one. Because you signed on it it could be your problem, obviously. But the whole thing about the giving. Does it make you feel good? Do you give just to give, from your heart? My mother in law gives and then kind of keeps a tally... I would not call that giving from the heart. She strives to be the matriarch of the family and desperately wants to be the puppet master. She accounts for EVERY made up holiday and even makes them up! LOl husband and I have given and loaned a lot. We gave a friend of his some money 2 years ago to start a Restaraunt in Chicago. We were going to see the money back in 6 months, then a year... have not seen it yet. But we fully talked about this prior to loaning it. I have given my friends things and money to help get them through when I have had the money or things to do so. Never gave it a second thought. Sometimes I didn't even tell them who it was from. I think no matter what your husband says , as long as you feel good about why and how you do it and it is not putting you in financial ruins. Maybe you can explain why it makes you feel good to give. Unless you think husband is correct??? Of course we all want people to like/love us, but if we know they will without the gift, is the real question. I don't know kind of rambling... coffee kicking in! [/QUOTE]
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