I know I shouldn't have ...

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by tracyf551, Jan 4, 2009.

  1. tracyf551

    tracyf551 New Member

    and I truely regret doing it, but I picked difficult child up from the police station. OOOOOHHHHHH, I am so mad at myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :mad: SORRY SO LONG.
    Here's the story....Happy New Year, get a call at 12:13 am from a local police station(well about 15 miles away) from an officer that they picked up difficult child and some "friends" for under age drinking. He's 18. Blew a .017. I picked him up but not before he heard from me and 3 other officers about the situation. I did not bring home home I dropped him near the house where he has been staying. Then on Friday night he calls me again bawling to pick him up across town, drunk again. I told him he will have to find his own way cuz I will not have him any where near my home like that.
    Then tonight he walks in here and I told him he needs to get the rest of his stuff and leave. Instead of getting his things he ran out of the house. I don't get it.
    Well I figure there will be a warrent out for his arrest in the next few months because he is not going to send the paper in for the underage drinking fine and he won't get a job to pay it either. He will be getting his first orange jump suit about the time he turns 19. I am sooooooooo fed up. I came straight out and ask him if he wants help. We could go right now. he flat out says no, says he's fine and doesn't need help. that everything that happens is someone elses fault.
    I told him its been someone elses fault since 8th grade. The teacher, principles, cops, parents, so and so on. When is it your fault, he says never. What the he!!. I give up.
    the rest of his stuff is outside and if he doesn't get it by the time I go to bed I'm taking to his "friends" house.

    I AM DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:faint:
  2. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Aren't those calls lovely. Another one who doesn't accept responsibilities for his choices. Ugh. Where do they get the idea they can just do what they want and be an adult until they need mommy or daddy to bail them out----Good for you. by the way--I wouldn't take his stuff to his friends. I would leave it there or put it by the road for the garbage man.
  3. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    EW had my first thought. Why would you bother to deliver his stuff? If he doesn't want it and it's in decent condition, either sell it or give it away. If it's junk, treat it accordingly.

    Honestly, I would have picked him from the jail station, too. The officer didn't say he was under arrest, just get him out of the station. I don't think you were wrong in getting him. You didn't bring him home. You didn't get him the next time he called. You offered to get him help. He refused. At this point, it is on him but I do believe you needed to give him the chance and you did that by your actions of the past few days.

  4. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    I'm with Meowbunny.
    Whatever of your son's stuff is fit to sell, sell. The rest, put out for the bin men.

    I don't think you did anything wrong in picking him up from the police station either. You did not let him come home, you offered help which he refused, and you didn't pick him up when he called drunk from across town.

    I think you handled the whole situation very well.

    Sending hugs, and strength to stay detached.

  5. tracyf551

    tracyf551 New Member

    i didn't take his stuff to his friends house.I figured that would be too easy for him. So its on the front porch. By the way its suppose to rain and the porch leaks!!!;)
  6. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE



  7. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Yeah for you.