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General Parenting
I let him push my buttons, then I paint him in a corner.
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<blockquote data-quote="Allan-Matlem" data-source="post: 348729" data-attributes="member: 10"><p>Hi,</p><p>in my humble opinion the reality is that we often cannot follow through with consequences , the kids don't have the skills to process the possibility of a consequence and change behavior , the focus moves to why the parent is unfair and the punishment mean instead of focusing on the problem and finding a durable solution. Consequences also undermine ' trust' . We try to help kids learn to trust us so that we can help them .</p><p></p><p>As a parent I make mistakes and apologize . One thing that I have learned is just to try and calm the kid and then focus on his concerns , then my concerns and start the problem solving process. It is not easy </p><p></p><p>Allan</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Allan-Matlem, post: 348729, member: 10"] Hi, in my humble opinion the reality is that we often cannot follow through with consequences , the kids don't have the skills to process the possibility of a consequence and change behavior , the focus moves to why the parent is unfair and the punishment mean instead of focusing on the problem and finding a durable solution. Consequences also undermine ' trust' . We try to help kids learn to trust us so that we can help them . As a parent I make mistakes and apologize . One thing that I have learned is just to try and calm the kid and then focus on his concerns , then my concerns and start the problem solving process. It is not easy Allan [/QUOTE]
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I let him push my buttons, then I paint him in a corner.
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