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I love my Life - I am the boyfiend
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<blockquote data-quote="Sickntired" data-source="post: 122265" data-attributes="member: 3848"><p>In my humble opinion, the best thing you can do for this difficult child is to be on the same page with her mother. You can still have differences in opinion, but you keep those between the two of you and present a united front. I have a difficult child who has ODD and is a teenager on top of that. I can guaranty you that child will play you, one against the other. In raising our other children, before this grandchild came along to raise, we had a standing joke in our family. I was the peacemaker and my husband was the terminator!!. I never really understood it until having to deal with this child. I am waaaayyyy to lax and he is waaaayyyy to heavy. We have had to come to a happy medium cause our difficult child was eating our lunch. These children, for whatever reason, thrive on everything being in havoc. It makes them feel almost powerful. Mine loves the argument. So, I try my hardest, and I am not always successful, to not argue. He knows our buttons and pushes them and pushes them really hard. There are days that so many problems are caused by this child that it is like a river that has come out of its bank, it floods everything. During those times, we just try to put things in perspective. He has an emotional disability. It's like having diabetes. Sometimes it is controlled, and other times it is not. Even though it seems like they do things on purpose, and sometimes they do just for the shock value, all things are not done on purpose. It's just the symptoms of the disease you are seeing. Hard to deal with? You bet ya. If you are in it for the long haul, put on your hard hat and try to get on the same page with her. Just like an army, there is strength in numbers. There are 2 of you and only 1 of her. Good luck.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sickntired, post: 122265, member: 3848"] In my humble opinion, the best thing you can do for this difficult child is to be on the same page with her mother. You can still have differences in opinion, but you keep those between the two of you and present a united front. I have a difficult child who has ODD and is a teenager on top of that. I can guaranty you that child will play you, one against the other. In raising our other children, before this grandchild came along to raise, we had a standing joke in our family. I was the peacemaker and my husband was the terminator!!. I never really understood it until having to deal with this child. I am waaaayyyy to lax and he is waaaayyyy to heavy. We have had to come to a happy medium cause our difficult child was eating our lunch. These children, for whatever reason, thrive on everything being in havoc. It makes them feel almost powerful. Mine loves the argument. So, I try my hardest, and I am not always successful, to not argue. He knows our buttons and pushes them and pushes them really hard. There are days that so many problems are caused by this child that it is like a river that has come out of its bank, it floods everything. During those times, we just try to put things in perspective. He has an emotional disability. It's like having diabetes. Sometimes it is controlled, and other times it is not. Even though it seems like they do things on purpose, and sometimes they do just for the shock value, all things are not done on purpose. It's just the symptoms of the disease you are seeing. Hard to deal with? You bet ya. If you are in it for the long haul, put on your hard hat and try to get on the same page with her. Just like an army, there is strength in numbers. There are 2 of you and only 1 of her. Good luck. [/QUOTE]
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