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I need a hug....
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<blockquote data-quote="WhymeMom?" data-source="post: 54848" data-attributes="member: 53"><p>Yep, best look over the archive for replies. He didn't hear you loved him, he didn't hear you are praying for him, what he did hear is criticism of how he is living.....Even as deserved as this comment is he isn't ready to open a dialogue into this part of his life. If you can't talk to him, you won't have any effect on him. </p><p></p><p>I am not trying to be critical of you, and I certainly don't know all the ins and outs of your relationship with your son, but it is a learning process on how to open the doors into a NEW relationship with your difficult child. You have no control over him, YOU are the only person you can control, and change. So change how you talk to him. Make short statements: Your mail is here. Oh, you know that? Great. I love you and I'm praying for you. That's all I wanted you to know. IF and when he asks for advice you can give it, but until then DO NOT offer advice or criticism. It's a slow dance, so don't move too quickly. </p><p></p><p>If I have overstepped my bounds please disregard what I have said, you may not be at the point I think you are and I have misread the situation..</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="WhymeMom?, post: 54848, member: 53"] Yep, best look over the archive for replies. He didn't hear you loved him, he didn't hear you are praying for him, what he did hear is criticism of how he is living.....Even as deserved as this comment is he isn't ready to open a dialogue into this part of his life. If you can't talk to him, you won't have any effect on him. I am not trying to be critical of you, and I certainly don't know all the ins and outs of your relationship with your son, but it is a learning process on how to open the doors into a NEW relationship with your difficult child. You have no control over him, YOU are the only person you can control, and change. So change how you talk to him. Make short statements: Your mail is here. Oh, you know that? Great. I love you and I'm praying for you. That's all I wanted you to know. IF and when he asks for advice you can give it, but until then DO NOT offer advice or criticism. It's a slow dance, so don't move too quickly. If I have overstepped my bounds please disregard what I have said, you may not be at the point I think you are and I have misread the situation.. [/QUOTE]
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