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I think my easy child is turning into a difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="Calamity Jane" data-source="post: 575779" data-attributes="member: 13882"><p>It seems like things have been steadily regressing since boyfriend came into the picture. I would be wondering more about their relationship - like is he verbally dismissive/abusive to easy child? He may be "poisoning the well" and since she is young and impressionable, she is mirroring it back to you. Healthy dating relationships increase our joy; they don't make us ungrateful and disrespectful.</p><p>Nevertheless, boundaries are good. She is already on her 3rd job, so she is experiencing real world consequences. If she isn't in never-never land, she will figure it out. You also can set your boundaries and eventually she will get it. "Loving correction" from you, whether it is accepted or not, is the best role you can play right now. Do not answer her disrespect in kind, but continue to exhibit a mature response and it will eventually hit her that this his how rational adults behave. Encourage her to express her concerns in a reasonable way, and tell her you want to know what's on her mind, as long as it's voiced in a reasonable manner: no one can argue with that. If she throws your past back in your face, tell her you have learned and grown, and wish she would do the same. Say that you're always going to be there for her with help and guidance, and she will have no recourse but to look inward. Hugs to you, I know it's hard.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Calamity Jane, post: 575779, member: 13882"] It seems like things have been steadily regressing since boyfriend came into the picture. I would be wondering more about their relationship - like is he verbally dismissive/abusive to easy child? He may be "poisoning the well" and since she is young and impressionable, she is mirroring it back to you. Healthy dating relationships increase our joy; they don't make us ungrateful and disrespectful. Nevertheless, boundaries are good. She is already on her 3rd job, so she is experiencing real world consequences. If she isn't in never-never land, she will figure it out. You also can set your boundaries and eventually she will get it. "Loving correction" from you, whether it is accepted or not, is the best role you can play right now. Do not answer her disrespect in kind, but continue to exhibit a mature response and it will eventually hit her that this his how rational adults behave. Encourage her to express her concerns in a reasonable way, and tell her you want to know what's on her mind, as long as it's voiced in a reasonable manner: no one can argue with that. If she throws your past back in your face, tell her you have learned and grown, and wish she would do the same. Say that you're always going to be there for her with help and guidance, and she will have no recourse but to look inward. Hugs to you, I know it's hard. [/QUOTE]
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