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I think my entire life is insane
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 505981" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>(((((hugs)))))</p><p></p><p>I am sorry it was such a rotten day. I think a cookbook would be an excellent idea. List the things that are pretty much foolproof and let them know that NOTHING else is to be prepared by Billy or Buck with-o your approval and direction. Let them know that if they make something and do NOT follow the directions, they THEY have to pony up the cash to replace the ingredients. And make them stick to it.</p><p></p><p>Why is Tony blaming you for what Billy and Buck do? Have you asked him in a calm time how he thinks you are supposed to control them? I am so sorry that you are so miserable.</p><p></p><p>It really sounds like you need to write out a list of house rules and then sit everyone down and tell them how it is going to be. You have to include the consequences too. Otherwise this is just going to keep getting worse. </p><p></p><p>What does the ortho tell you about your knee? Is a replacement possible? What can be done about the amt of pain you are in? Do you feel that you can keep your medications safe from Buck? I know you have the safe that is bolted down, but if Tony can get in, would Tony give him some of your medications? Buck seems to have a HUGE influence over Tony and I am worried about you.</p><p></p><p>Know that I am thinking of you, and hoping that things settle down soon. It sounds like an awful day. Maybe you should keep waking Billy up for a few nights (you are up anyway, aren't you?) so that he can get a clue that when you say "I need to sleep. Leave me alone.", he needs to leave you alone.</p><p></p><p>I KNOW you worked so hard to get over the old patterns of behavior that you used to have. But you are going to have to be creative to keep these men from running you ragged, being stupid and then blaming you for everything. Sadly, it always falls to us to make them behave halfway decently. I know Billy has diagnosis's, but he is fully capable of cooking and in my opinion did that because he doesn't want you to ever ask him to cook. He wants you to do all the work and is using creative incompetence to make having him do something be more of a problem for you than doing it for him. Do what you have to in order to get some sleep, then sit and amke a list of what you are able to do - that is what you can co with-o hurting yourself!! Then sit and make a list of consequences for doing it wrong. Paying for the wasted food and having to remake it is one. If you get a list of what you want the men to do, I am sure some of us can figure out ways to make doing these things wrong be more of a chore FOR THEM than they could make it for you.</p><p></p><p>I hope you can find a therapist to help you through this. You have so much on your plate. Have you started taking the pain medications the way they are prescribed? If nothing else those should help you sleep for a while. </p><p></p><p>(((((hugs)))))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 505981, member: 1233"] (((((hugs))))) I am sorry it was such a rotten day. I think a cookbook would be an excellent idea. List the things that are pretty much foolproof and let them know that NOTHING else is to be prepared by Billy or Buck with-o your approval and direction. Let them know that if they make something and do NOT follow the directions, they THEY have to pony up the cash to replace the ingredients. And make them stick to it. Why is Tony blaming you for what Billy and Buck do? Have you asked him in a calm time how he thinks you are supposed to control them? I am so sorry that you are so miserable. It really sounds like you need to write out a list of house rules and then sit everyone down and tell them how it is going to be. You have to include the consequences too. Otherwise this is just going to keep getting worse. What does the ortho tell you about your knee? Is a replacement possible? What can be done about the amt of pain you are in? Do you feel that you can keep your medications safe from Buck? I know you have the safe that is bolted down, but if Tony can get in, would Tony give him some of your medications? Buck seems to have a HUGE influence over Tony and I am worried about you. Know that I am thinking of you, and hoping that things settle down soon. It sounds like an awful day. Maybe you should keep waking Billy up for a few nights (you are up anyway, aren't you?) so that he can get a clue that when you say "I need to sleep. Leave me alone.", he needs to leave you alone. I KNOW you worked so hard to get over the old patterns of behavior that you used to have. But you are going to have to be creative to keep these men from running you ragged, being stupid and then blaming you for everything. Sadly, it always falls to us to make them behave halfway decently. I know Billy has diagnosis's, but he is fully capable of cooking and in my opinion did that because he doesn't want you to ever ask him to cook. He wants you to do all the work and is using creative incompetence to make having him do something be more of a problem for you than doing it for him. Do what you have to in order to get some sleep, then sit and amke a list of what you are able to do - that is what you can co with-o hurting yourself!! Then sit and make a list of consequences for doing it wrong. Paying for the wasted food and having to remake it is one. If you get a list of what you want the men to do, I am sure some of us can figure out ways to make doing these things wrong be more of a chore FOR THEM than they could make it for you. I hope you can find a therapist to help you through this. You have so much on your plate. Have you started taking the pain medications the way they are prescribed? If nothing else those should help you sleep for a while. (((((hugs))))) [/QUOTE]
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