I told difficult child he's a fear biter

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by TerryJ2, May 2, 2012.

  1. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Two nights ago, he was doing well with-all his chores, not too terribly grumpy about losing the TV/XBox cord because he knew he'd deserved to lose it. He was in his room, and I wanted to congratulate him on taking out the trash, a relatively new chore he's been doing, since he balked it for so many yrs. We've got a very long gravel driveway.
    husband came home and said, "I worked for 12 hrs straight today, and you don't know how good it feels to know I don't have to take out the trash." :)

    So I went into difficult child's room to tell him. He was wearing his ear pods (or whatever they're called). I knocked, and said his name and he looked up. So I continued, "Dad said ......... so Way To Go! Congratulations!"
    At the same time he put up his hand to match my High 5, he shouted, "Shut UP! GET OUT!"

    Say what?
    husband says I should do more fun things with-difficult child. Play games. Give him compliments. And that would be because it's so easy and so productive? :sochildish::kickme:
    husband heard us, and went into difficult child's room and yelled at him.
    Yesterday, difficult child came into my office and said, "I'm hungry, I want cookies, I want the XBox and I want to go to K's."

    "After the other night, you think you're getting rewarded?"

    "I SAID I was SORRY!"
    Oh, how heartfelt.
    "I was on the phone with-N and I was in a bad mood."
    "That's an excuse, not a reason."

    (They fight constantly. They talk forever about every little thing, until they talk about minutiae, and then they yell at one another. They both need to get a life so they can be more interesting people. I can't wait for them to break up.):hamwheelsmilf:

    I told him he was a fear biter. He had no idea what it was, so I explained it. He of course blamed it all on me. I told him it could work both ways. He stormed out. But at least he quit bugging me about all of his "wants."
    Last edited: May 2, 2012
  2. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    So, yesterday, within a 45 min time span, he shouted they he hated me, and then he loved me.
    How does one respond to this?:sigh:
  3. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    Because we all know how spending good, quality time with a difficult child solves everything, right?

    My difficult child does the same thing. He will spew terrible, hateful things, and then ask for things. I tell him the same thing you do. "After you spoke so rudely to me you expect me to do things for you?" and I get the same answer. "I said I was sorry!" Sometimes sorry just isn't enough.
  4. keista

    keista New Member

    I usually answer with "I KNOW" :sigh: and "I KNOW" :flirtysmile3:
  5. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    LOL! Good one. :)
  6. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Ummm... Terry?
    Whenever somebody says that YOU "should" do X or Y... in reality they need to shoulder the project themselves... Yes, it needs to be done. He knows that. But the answer isn't in YOU doing it. husband needs to. (I know, he isn't listening to ME... )
  7. buddy

    buddy New Member

    LOL, I always think you must have a camera in my house and telling my story....Really crazy. So, this morning as Q was in the rest room I am tossing his clean shorts and shirt into him and he is going on and on with the ugly blurts but as soon as he catches the clothes politely says (a more voluntary statement in my humble opinion) Thanks mom....

    I love you, I love you not...............I love you , I love you not... UGGGG
  8. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Insane, good point.

    Buddy ... sigh.