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General Parenting
I was a monster this morning. I am so ashamed...
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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 480568" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Oh, Chaos, been there done that! Know all about the anger and then the regret... But... I do agree with the others who have said that your anger was also valid. It is not necessarily a bad thing - it is not all bad. Carson knows you love him and that you are not going to abandon him. Your anger comes in that context. And it was real, and it was like a boundary for him, a demarcation of where he must not cross - and that is useful for a child because it is how life is, all the time... The thing our children don't "get" is that others have needs and wants just like them, that their own needs and wants are not actually centre stage. In a way you showed him that this morning. Okay, it was ugly and it may be good to say that you regret the way you expressed yourself but not what you said. As has been said, food for discussion... I have been surprised that sometimes I have kind of "got annoyed" at my son in a very human and un-text book way and it has made him stop doing whatever it is he is doing. I can see that, surprisingly, he has not actually minded. It is all something to do with the "cleanness" of the anger - if it's coming from a nasty place, that's different. Thanks for posting about such a very relevant topic...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 480568, member: 11227"] Oh, Chaos, been there done that! Know all about the anger and then the regret... But... I do agree with the others who have said that your anger was also valid. It is not necessarily a bad thing - it is not all bad. Carson knows you love him and that you are not going to abandon him. Your anger comes in that context. And it was real, and it was like a boundary for him, a demarcation of where he must not cross - and that is useful for a child because it is how life is, all the time... The thing our children don't "get" is that others have needs and wants just like them, that their own needs and wants are not actually centre stage. In a way you showed him that this morning. Okay, it was ugly and it may be good to say that you regret the way you expressed yourself but not what you said. As has been said, food for discussion... I have been surprised that sometimes I have kind of "got annoyed" at my son in a very human and un-text book way and it has made him stop doing whatever it is he is doing. I can see that, surprisingly, he has not actually minded. It is all something to do with the "cleanness" of the anger - if it's coming from a nasty place, that's different. Thanks for posting about such a very relevant topic... [/QUOTE]
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I was a monster this morning. I am so ashamed...
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