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I was thinking...
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<blockquote data-quote="gcvmom" data-source="post: 156262" data-attributes="member: 3444"><p>It's weird, but right now things are going somewhat smoothly for me -- I mean a heckofalot smoother than they have in the past 12 months (hmmm, difficult child 2's manic breakdown last spring and the ensuing four months it took to stabilize, husband's brain surgery in February and the months of appointments and tests leading up to that, difficult child 2's school suspensions this fall/winter, his neurological diagnosis in March, his IEP, difficult child 1's IBS diagnosis on top of his Crohn's last month and many days of school missed...) But despite the relative calm, I find my anxiety levels still humming a bit -- like I'm afraid to really relax because it's just a matter of time... </p><p> </p><p>I know that's not healthy, but it's hard to let your guard down when you've been on high alert for so long. I don't want to be addicted to the drama either. Boring is nice. Boring means I can catch up on laundry and dust bunnies and I can have a garden again <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gcvmom, post: 156262, member: 3444"] It's weird, but right now things are going somewhat smoothly for me -- I mean a heckofalot smoother than they have in the past 12 months (hmmm, difficult child 2's manic breakdown last spring and the ensuing four months it took to stabilize, husband's brain surgery in February and the months of appointments and tests leading up to that, difficult child 2's school suspensions this fall/winter, his neurological diagnosis in March, his IEP, difficult child 1's IBS diagnosis on top of his Crohn's last month and many days of school missed...) But despite the relative calm, I find my anxiety levels still humming a bit -- like I'm afraid to really relax because it's just a matter of time... I know that's not healthy, but it's hard to let your guard down when you've been on high alert for so long. I don't want to be addicted to the drama either. Boring is nice. Boring means I can catch up on laundry and dust bunnies and I can have a garden again :) [/QUOTE]
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