so great that he got student of the day awards. I wish all of those positive behavior schools would do student of the day...maybe even just class by class. Q used to say, mom I have been here 3 years and I never get student of the month. He never would for sure. but he probably tried harder every minute of every day than any other kid had to do accomplish any little bit of work. I did feel sad about that many times. I did tell him I was proud of every little thing, but he is not one to love compliments at times. He has gotten better and now says in a low tone...thanks. But at other times he has even said to me, you need to "encourage" me, not get mad I didn't do something. I know it was an emotional ploy at the time to not do what I was asking him to fix, but I also think he really does feel that often, at least from his Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) perspective.....
My most jealous moments are when I see my nephews who are both around the same age, playing and doing everything together. Even when Q comes over they have stopped playing games and not let him play in case he erases data or whatever. I have said, well if you play with him then he wont be the one clicking on things. Stop abandoning him every time he comes around. He looks forward to being with you, it is maybe once ever two months, so maybe you could try. In the past two years they have become more patient and understanding.. the 12 yr old even called me to just check to see how Q was in the hospital. My sister had no idea. The other asked me if he was going to die. proceeded to tell me a story of a time his mom had to take a reward away from him after being disrespectful and he said he told his mom, that was too harsh, he said he felt so sorry for him.
When they were little my sisters did a "boys" picture and they left Q out. they bought matching outfits and everything. It really still makes me tear up. Like they didn't think how it would feel to have him not be on the grandparents refrigerator and have Q ask why he is not there. And he did. the number of pics of him in general on their walls and refrigerators is very low comparatively speaking. I do get jealous, I admit it and it is not right I am sure.
I have said before too, I know it is not the end of the world, but I do feel sad for him when I think he wont ever have a real career or live on his own or have children. and I wont have grand babies. I will have lots of great nieces/nephews and we are close so I know I will have a similar experience...but for my son, I do get sad once in a while. I am good at pulling myself out of it usually. Just moments of a pity party....(as IC put it once, lol)
long post for a short idea: I get it, it can be hard at moments, but great you can share the amazing accomplishments, that is something typical parents don't get... the extraordinary joy each and every achievement can hold. It means multiple times more than a typical achievement. We get to be privileged to see those steps and support our difficult child's