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Failure to Thrive
I'm back after 18 years
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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 743385" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>Wow, you have been through so much, Nancy. And Elsi and everyone.</p><p>This thread caught my attention because I am POA and guardian for my 90-year-old cousin, who has borderline personality disorder. The only thing that has kept my sanity is writing and painting. I am writing a book about her--her idea--she was an actress and dancer. It has the funny moments and absurdities she wanted. But I put in the *rest of the story.* I have not read it to her ... she has dementia on top of it all. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /></p><p>My worst years occurred while moving her from NYC to Virginia and getting her from doctor's appointment to doctor's appointment--at the same time my son was at his "peak."</p><p>Again, I wrote about it to keep my sanity (and posted a lot here!), and a publisher gave me the opportunity to create my own poetry chapbook. When I read it, I can always tell who has been through the same thing; they hang back in the audience to come up to me and talk afterwards. There are a lot of hidden caregivers out there. And it helps to feel that we are not alone.</p><p>Someone mentioned DBT--I had no idea what those initials meant until recently. My daughter recommended that to my son! And the online doctor he found and spoke to today does use that method.</p><p>Nancy, you MUST take care of yourself. I am well aware of the drama surrounding you, if only because it sounds so familiar. There is no excuse for your daughter to have admitted herself to the hospital on BOTH occasions when you and your husband had major surgeries. Sigh. We love our children. They scare us half to death. But at some point, we have to let life take care of itself, for better or for worse.</p><p>I am so glad that you are here. This is a great group of people. I left for 2-3 years and now I'm back. So glad to be here.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 743385, member: 3419"] Wow, you have been through so much, Nancy. And Elsi and everyone. This thread caught my attention because I am POA and guardian for my 90-year-old cousin, who has borderline personality disorder. The only thing that has kept my sanity is writing and painting. I am writing a book about her--her idea--she was an actress and dancer. It has the funny moments and absurdities she wanted. But I put in the *rest of the story.* I have not read it to her ... she has dementia on top of it all. :( My worst years occurred while moving her from NYC to Virginia and getting her from doctor's appointment to doctor's appointment--at the same time my son was at his "peak." Again, I wrote about it to keep my sanity (and posted a lot here!), and a publisher gave me the opportunity to create my own poetry chapbook. When I read it, I can always tell who has been through the same thing; they hang back in the audience to come up to me and talk afterwards. There are a lot of hidden caregivers out there. And it helps to feel that we are not alone. Someone mentioned DBT--I had no idea what those initials meant until recently. My daughter recommended that to my son! And the online doctor he found and spoke to today does use that method. Nancy, you MUST take care of yourself. I am well aware of the drama surrounding you, if only because it sounds so familiar. There is no excuse for your daughter to have admitted herself to the hospital on BOTH occasions when you and your husband had major surgeries. Sigh. We love our children. They scare us half to death. But at some point, we have to let life take care of itself, for better or for worse. I am so glad that you are here. This is a great group of people. I left for 2-3 years and now I'm back. So glad to be here. [/QUOTE]
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