I say I'm done , but why do I try over and over to reconnect and the end is always the same. 1 step forward 2 steps back.this has been going on for almost a year. Our 45 year old daughter has banished her father , myself because connected I chose him over her, her mother in law, brother in law ,(his banisment ment has been lifted after 2 years) . The other grandfather is the only one who had once been banished has been back in their fold for 3 years. It has been mentioned that this banishment woukd be reinstated a few times over time but.his punishment woukd last for a month and then lifted. I know I sound sarcastic and bitter but without exaggeration this is how it is. Late in life they gave one child and there will be no more, myself and ny daughter will reconnect but it doesn't last. The hurt and anger runs too deep inside me. I can't talk to her on the phone as she don't talk to listen , she talks to respond. And when she feels challenged, she gets extremely defensive. Therefore I am resorted to texting. Many times she doesn't read my texts carefully enough, and misinterprets and flies of the handle. Case in point her 5 year old son is suffering from anxiety, my daughter has told me that a physiologist has told her that he is suffering the loss of his other grandmother as well. Therefore it's the grandmothers fault that she got banished for the child best interest and it's her to Blane for his suffering. My daughter is all about blame this one, blame that one. I told her that he's only 5 he doesn't know or care whoes to blame all he knows he's hurting. She blames us for his anxiety because we moved an hours drive away when we retired. Partly it was to get away from her needing us at her beck and call 24 7. Today was my umpteenth last straw . I text , she responds she text , I respond but when she doesn't like what I have to say she gets defensive, belligerent and nasty. When I respond she she accuses me of trying to start an argument , I'm harassing her, she's going to have charges placed on me and told me twice to Foff. Excuse me. That's the first time she has went this far. I'm beyond hurt, I'm deep,y angry my health and my husbands health has been severally compromised over this past year due to this. I seen a therapist who told me my only option is to sever ties. . I don't know how to do that , I don't know how to make it stick , I cave , I go back and all I get is more of the same. Each time it gets worse . She stole our happiness, our health, our family, she stole her son the ability to be surrounded by his grandparents on his birthday, Christmas holidays and in her head it's everyone else's fault. When she was told her father went to emerg with all signs of a heart attack her response don't expect sympathy from her he did it to himself. What makes me go back for more. Maybe to ease my desperation and despair? I need to remove myself permanently but don't know how.