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General Parenting
I'm exhaused, penniless and alone.....
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 130449" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Hang in there, sis.</p><p></p><p>Sometimes family are the last ones to really see that it's much more serious than bad parenting. It's easier to believe you are incompetent, or crazy, than there is a really big problem going on. She may change her opinion eventually. Or not. Just don't burn your bridges, don't waste energy getting angry with her. Just don't confide in her if she isn't likely to understand, and she won't have anything to use against you.</p><p></p><p>Meanwhile - we are here. been there done that. Lots of practical advice.</p><p></p><p>And a question for you - was the bipolar diagnosis for difficult child 2 BFORE the autism label? Because if so, I would question whether the bipolar was the same thing, now described as autism. There are a number of labels which are sometimes applied sequentially to our kids, depending on what the doctor sees, when, and who the doctor is. We don't get much bipolar as labels in Australia, for example (not saying whether this is right, or wrong - I don't know. Just tat diagnosing patterns vary from country to country, but I don't think the disorder varies the same way). Labels are only an estimate, not always matched by reality. Whatever-it-is he has, how likely is it that it's both bipolar AND autism?</p><p></p><p>I strongly suspect that if we brought difficult child 3 to the US, he would get a bipolar diagnosis. Similarly, the same doctor might discount the autism label, thinking it not a good fit.</p><p></p><p>Lables can be very subjective, but they can make a big difference in how we see the kids, and how they are treated.</p><p></p><p>Just a question, as I said, for you to think about, maybe verify with the doctor. because if some doctor some time ago said, "bipolar," and another doctor recently has said, "autism," I suspect if you got both those doctors in the same room you would NOT get agreement. And I wonder if you would still get both labels at the same time.</p><p></p><p>I hope I'm making myself clear - I'm tired tonight, might be more likely to waffle on.</p><p></p><p>Good luck with it all, be good to yourself. Try and find out if there are any allowances/benefits you could access. Maybe see if you can get more child support from ex?</p><p></p><p>Keep us posted.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 130449, member: 1991"] Hang in there, sis. Sometimes family are the last ones to really see that it's much more serious than bad parenting. It's easier to believe you are incompetent, or crazy, than there is a really big problem going on. She may change her opinion eventually. Or not. Just don't burn your bridges, don't waste energy getting angry with her. Just don't confide in her if she isn't likely to understand, and she won't have anything to use against you. Meanwhile - we are here. been there done that. Lots of practical advice. And a question for you - was the bipolar diagnosis for difficult child 2 BFORE the autism label? Because if so, I would question whether the bipolar was the same thing, now described as autism. There are a number of labels which are sometimes applied sequentially to our kids, depending on what the doctor sees, when, and who the doctor is. We don't get much bipolar as labels in Australia, for example (not saying whether this is right, or wrong - I don't know. Just tat diagnosing patterns vary from country to country, but I don't think the disorder varies the same way). Labels are only an estimate, not always matched by reality. Whatever-it-is he has, how likely is it that it's both bipolar AND autism? I strongly suspect that if we brought difficult child 3 to the US, he would get a bipolar diagnosis. Similarly, the same doctor might discount the autism label, thinking it not a good fit. Lables can be very subjective, but they can make a big difference in how we see the kids, and how they are treated. Just a question, as I said, for you to think about, maybe verify with the doctor. because if some doctor some time ago said, "bipolar," and another doctor recently has said, "autism," I suspect if you got both those doctors in the same room you would NOT get agreement. And I wonder if you would still get both labels at the same time. I hope I'm making myself clear - I'm tired tonight, might be more likely to waffle on. Good luck with it all, be good to yourself. Try and find out if there are any allowances/benefits you could access. Maybe see if you can get more child support from ex? Keep us posted. Marg [/QUOTE]
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