Put your phone on vibrate and keep it in a drawer. Use it only when YOU want or need to make a call. Dont engage your daughter or son in law at all. The key is to stop communicating. It hurts you more than them.
If you feel like engaging either post here first.
You have to change before your life will change but im sure your therapists already told you this.
In the end, you need to want the situation to change enough to do it just like your daughter wont change unless she is unhappy enough to admit she has a problem. It will not be easy to change your tendancy to react, but if you want to stop hearing the mean lies and contributing to the drama...you can and if it means enough to you, you will. There is always tomorrow.
I was a reactive person too and still want to react in tense situations. I have to remind myself how horribly that always turned out, especially for me.
Food for thought. Do think of yourself first. You deserve a good life. Youve done your time.
Your daughter doesnt want to leave her husband. There are womans shelters she can go to. She is too old to need a mommy. She can take care of herself. Dont even listen to her guilt trip.
