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Parent Emeritus
i'm learning....... slowly
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<blockquote data-quote="CrazyinVA" data-source="post: 425131" data-attributes="member: 1157"><p>I agree. One of the important lessons of the detachment process for me, was learning to keep my mouth shut, and remaining matter-of-fact in my exchanges with either of my difficult children. One of my many books calls it the "dispassionate cop" attitude (similar to the way a police officer might react to a lawbreaker ranting and raving at them). It's not always easy, especially because difficult children are masters at button-pushing. Sometimes, I fail miserably. But when I'm able to adopt that attitude, things de-escalate more quickly, difficult children begin to (slowly) lessen their "attacks" on me, and I walk away with my sanity and blood pressure in check.</p><p></p><p>That being said, it doesn't mean you can't make those comments to us, we get it ;-)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CrazyinVA, post: 425131, member: 1157"] I agree. One of the important lessons of the detachment process for me, was learning to keep my mouth shut, and remaining matter-of-fact in my exchanges with either of my difficult children. One of my many books calls it the "dispassionate cop" attitude (similar to the way a police officer might react to a lawbreaker ranting and raving at them). It's not always easy, especially because difficult children are masters at button-pushing. Sometimes, I fail miserably. But when I'm able to adopt that attitude, things de-escalate more quickly, difficult children begin to (slowly) lessen their "attacks" on me, and I walk away with my sanity and blood pressure in check. That being said, it doesn't mean you can't make those comments to us, we get it ;-) [/QUOTE]
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