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Family of Origin
In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 664895" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>She would, Serenity.</p><p></p><p>Isn't that something. That whole power thing, that drive to shame and publicly humiliate that they all seem to carry. Do you think it could be that they do that to prove to us that we are, as Copa describes it, "low rent"?</p><p></p><p>Looking for external validation of their fabricated worlds, of their grandiosity?</p><p></p><p>Isn't that something. That's how we grew up ~ in the service of that kind of thing. Boy, that makes me mad.</p><p></p><p>But you know, when I think about the way my mother talks about everyone in her life, or about the way they talk about one another, or about the way my sister talks about the things she does, because of her religious beliefs I suppose, for her friends...that is the theme that comes up there, too.</p><p></p><p>Maybe they think everyone is like them, and can't quite figure us out, either.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>She would love for him to disinherit you completely, just on general principles, because that would service her need for grandiosity.</p><p></p><p>The blogging is just a ready excuse.</p><p></p><p>As is any claim that what you do or do not do, here in this anonymous place, affects her in any way.</p><p></p><p>She is the one who was reprimanded, by those on her own site, who are honestly trying to help themselves understand their situations. </p><p></p><p>And now that I am looking in this new way? I see those same kinds of behaviors from my sister, too.</p><p></p><p>And my mom.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>When I read the first paragraph? Imagery of my brother.</p><p></p><p>BOOM</p><p></p><p>Imagery of my brother.</p><p></p><p>And then, I read the second paragraph.</p><p></p><p>And that imagery makes me feel awful to this very day.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I will put this in my quote box.</p><p></p><p>To understand the dynamic of the thing is to give it parameters; to limit the wide-ranging effects.</p><p></p><p>To name it.</p><p></p><p>Thank you, Copa. This will be very helpful to me. I am always finding myself back in that place, in that FOG place, even when I think I am through it.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 664895, member: 17461"] She would, Serenity. Isn't that something. That whole power thing, that drive to shame and publicly humiliate that they all seem to carry. Do you think it could be that they do that to prove to us that we are, as Copa describes it, "low rent"? Looking for external validation of their fabricated worlds, of their grandiosity? Isn't that something. That's how we grew up ~ in the service of that kind of thing. Boy, that makes me mad. But you know, when I think about the way my mother talks about everyone in her life, or about the way they talk about one another, or about the way my sister talks about the things she does, because of her religious beliefs I suppose, for her friends...that is the theme that comes up there, too. Maybe they think everyone is like them, and can't quite figure us out, either. She would love for him to disinherit you completely, just on general principles, because that would service her need for grandiosity. The blogging is just a ready excuse. As is any claim that what you do or do not do, here in this anonymous place, affects her in any way. She is the one who was reprimanded, by those on her own site, who are honestly trying to help themselves understand their situations. And now that I am looking in this new way? I see those same kinds of behaviors from my sister, too. And my mom. When I read the first paragraph? Imagery of my brother. BOOM Imagery of my brother. And then, I read the second paragraph. And that imagery makes me feel awful to this very day. I will put this in my quote box. To understand the dynamic of the thing is to give it parameters; to limit the wide-ranging effects. To name it. Thank you, Copa. This will be very helpful to me. I am always finding myself back in that place, in that FOG place, even when I think I am through it. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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