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Family of Origin
In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 665564" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>I don't know what they think, Copa. I do know that as my sister and my mom spent more time together after my father was gone, my sister's attitude got to be one of how poorly my mother was cared for here in the summer compared to how well she was cared for by my sister. Really, it was so blatantly obvious that she was massaging the facts pretty hard to come to those conclusions <em>but to her, that is what she needed to believe, and so, she did.</em> There was that same sense of crawling on top and justifying it through accusation.</p><p></p><p>That's all I know about that.</p><p></p><p>My sister does this around everything else too, I now realize.</p><p></p><p>But I first spotted it in the way she behaved when my father was in the hospital. It was off balance behavior. Nothing about it (the sucker incident) made sense.</p><p>She does that same thing now in her care of my mother. </p><p></p><p>Climbing on top.</p><p></p><p>We see it too in Serenity's sister's behaviors. Stalking, a kind of endless fascination with us, calling the police. (Or, walking with the Lord).</p><p></p><p>All ways of looking meant to diminish us, to find "proof" of our ~ of something. But here is the thing: Each of us has had experiences where our sisters were behaving inappropriately and excused it. How is it they seem committed to doing the opposite?</p><p></p><p>Since it's happening with all three sisters, it has to be a FOO thing. Probably, they believe themselves. I still think it has to do with their feelings re: pseudo mom and especially, with having seen pseudo mom abused by real mom.</p><p></p><p>Maybe that is the pattern they are trying to duplicate.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 665564, member: 17461"] I don't know what they think, Copa. I do know that as my sister and my mom spent more time together after my father was gone, my sister's attitude got to be one of how poorly my mother was cared for here in the summer compared to how well she was cared for by my sister. Really, it was so blatantly obvious that she was massaging the facts pretty hard to come to those conclusions [I]but to her, that is what she needed to believe, and so, she did.[/I] There was that same sense of crawling on top and justifying it through accusation. That's all I know about that. My sister does this around everything else too, I now realize. But I first spotted it in the way she behaved when my father was in the hospital. It was off balance behavior. Nothing about it (the sucker incident) made sense. She does that same thing now in her care of my mother. Climbing on top. We see it too in Serenity's sister's behaviors. Stalking, a kind of endless fascination with us, calling the police. (Or, walking with the Lord). All ways of looking meant to diminish us, to find "proof" of our ~ of something. But here is the thing: Each of us has had experiences where our sisters were behaving inappropriately and excused it. How is it they seem committed to doing the opposite? Since it's happening with all three sisters, it has to be a FOO thing. Probably, they believe themselves. I still think it has to do with their feelings re: pseudo mom and especially, with having seen pseudo mom abused by real mom. Maybe that is the pattern they are trying to duplicate. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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