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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 372405"><p>I hope others can give you good ideas about where to get help. My guess is you need a thorough evaluation by a neuropsychologist to get a better understanding of how his brain works.</p><p></p><p>I will say medications can be a mixed bag depending on the kid. My son is Adhd and we tried several different stimulant medications and they all made him depressed. Aderall in particular was really bad. The other stimulants caused similar problems just not as drastic. i went to a talk recently about medications and they talked about the different brain chemicals and the balance of them and the stimulants tend to increase one of them (cant remember which one) but if that gets out of balance then it can cause depression. </p><p></p><p>Anyway you may want to take him off all medications, get a good neuropsychologist consult with him without medications and then see what they recommend. Keep track of which medications he has been on and how they have worked.</p><p></p><p>I went through a phase when my son was that age where I really wondered if he would grow up to be an axe murderer because he tended to be so agressive.... if we were at an outing and some kid was punched I always knew my kid was invovled. He would get mad at me and kick, hit, punch me etc. We kept working on it and although now (at age 18) he can still be agressive etc.. he has much more control over it. He has threatened me with violence but he has not actually hit me or been violent to me since he was 8 or 10 years old. He always stopped himself before it got that far.</p><p></p><p>It does sound like he is jealous of his sibling and so for that I would first make sure they are never alone together in a room and then somehow see if you can have some special one on one time with him so that he has your full attention without his sibling there. You may already do that.</p><p></p><p>Oh and a kind of a funny story about my easy child daughter. Same age difference as your two. So she was about 3 and my difficult child son was about 7. He was sitting in the hallway and she was sitting in a different room. All of a sudden I heard her saying "Stop that difficult child (using his name of course), Stop that"...Well I was absolutely shocked because he was sitting right in front of me. He was not doing anything to her at all. I realized that when she whimpered i would often get upset with him becuase of course sometimes he did do something to her..... but I also realized that my daughter, even at her young age, had learned to play that to the hilt!!! So after that I was very careful not to blame him for doing something to her unless I saw it.</p><p></p><p>They ended up having a good relationship during their childhood.... now they don't because of the path he has taken and she is kind of disgusted with him. My hope is that some day they will have a better relationship but it won't happen until my difficult child has his act together.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 372405"] I hope others can give you good ideas about where to get help. My guess is you need a thorough evaluation by a neuropsychologist to get a better understanding of how his brain works. I will say medications can be a mixed bag depending on the kid. My son is Adhd and we tried several different stimulant medications and they all made him depressed. Aderall in particular was really bad. The other stimulants caused similar problems just not as drastic. i went to a talk recently about medications and they talked about the different brain chemicals and the balance of them and the stimulants tend to increase one of them (cant remember which one) but if that gets out of balance then it can cause depression. Anyway you may want to take him off all medications, get a good neuropsychologist consult with him without medications and then see what they recommend. Keep track of which medications he has been on and how they have worked. I went through a phase when my son was that age where I really wondered if he would grow up to be an axe murderer because he tended to be so agressive.... if we were at an outing and some kid was punched I always knew my kid was invovled. He would get mad at me and kick, hit, punch me etc. We kept working on it and although now (at age 18) he can still be agressive etc.. he has much more control over it. He has threatened me with violence but he has not actually hit me or been violent to me since he was 8 or 10 years old. He always stopped himself before it got that far. It does sound like he is jealous of his sibling and so for that I would first make sure they are never alone together in a room and then somehow see if you can have some special one on one time with him so that he has your full attention without his sibling there. You may already do that. Oh and a kind of a funny story about my easy child daughter. Same age difference as your two. So she was about 3 and my difficult child son was about 7. He was sitting in the hallway and she was sitting in a different room. All of a sudden I heard her saying "Stop that difficult child (using his name of course), Stop that"...Well I was absolutely shocked because he was sitting right in front of me. He was not doing anything to her at all. I realized that when she whimpered i would often get upset with him becuase of course sometimes he did do something to her..... but I also realized that my daughter, even at her young age, had learned to play that to the hilt!!! So after that I was very careful not to blame him for doing something to her unless I saw it. They ended up having a good relationship during their childhood.... now they don't because of the path he has taken and she is kind of disgusted with him. My hope is that some day they will have a better relationship but it won't happen until my difficult child has his act together. [/QUOTE]
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